The choices we make and The chances we take.. Determine our Destiny..

We are free to choose our actions, but we have no control over the consequences of those actions…
People forget the great power they possess within, the power to shape their lives..
Our lives are shaped by the choices we make.
You are the one who chooses how to live your life or create your life’s path.
Our future will not be determined by chance, but rather by the choices we make today.
Life is a series of choices.
I like to call it the GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY.
The choices we make now affect the options available for the next round of choices.
Learning how and what to choose, may be the most important information you can educate yourself with. There is no such thing as perfection or even the perfect human being.
Everyone has flaws whether we choose to accept ìt or NOT, whether we like it or NOT, but it is not something to become tense or even stress about.
It is our imperfections that make us imperfectly perfect human beings.
These imperfections school us about ourselves and the mistakes we make in life.
Lessons learnt from those mistakes tend to teach us how to be better and not make us bitter.
Fortunate are those who make the concerted effort to learn from those mistakes, and by not letting those very mistakes rule them, now they become a step closer to being better than they were the mistake before, being a tad more knowledgeable as to whether the next act should be a good or bad one.
There are moment’s in our lives when we find ourselves at crossroads.
The choices we make in those moments can define the present and determine the future.
And, of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back.
Which i totally disagree with no matter how painful or difficult the adversity, move forward, fight against every obstacle and you will without a doubt find success.
There may be times we make choices that cause our path to become tough, confusing and uncertain.
Our path seems like a series of hills and valleys, there is never any balance.
When this happens, we should stop and examine the choices we made that have lead us down this path.
We should evaluate those choices and identify alternatives or new choices that will bring us back to our true path, the one we originally created.
If you have chosen to be someone who wants to keep on judging, then go ahead, do not expect any better from anyone else…
If you choose to live a deceitful, disgraceful, unethical life, then please don’t expect nature to do you any favors, if you have turned away from Allah for that quick fix solution, I suggest you kick the habit and repent, as it is never to late for Allah’s mercy and forgiveness…
Once again we shape our lives by the choices we make…
If you do not make a decision and by this i mean all the right choices and decisions, then time will make it for you and time will always side against you…
Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions…
The Choices We Make Determine the People We Become.
Knowledge is a tree
Words are it’s leaves
But Action is it fruit
“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then you have become a leader.”

Marriage is Ugly..

Marriage is ugly, you see the absolute worst in someone. You see them when they are mad, sad, being stubborn, when they are so unlovable they make you scream. But you also get to see them when they are laughing so hard that tears run down their face, and they cannot help but let out those weird gurgling noises.
You see them at 3am when the world is asleep except you two, and you are eating in the middle of the kitchen floor. You get to see the side of them that no one else does, and it is not always pretty. Its snorting while laughing, its the tears when it feels like its all crashing down, its the farting, its the bedhead and bad breath, its the random dances, its the anger and the joy.
Marriage is not a beautiful thing, but it is amazing. It is knowing that someone loves you so much, and will not leave you even though you said something nasty. It is having someone have your back no matter what. Its fights over stupid things, like someone not doing the dishes or picking up after themselves. And it’s those nights you fall asleep in each others arms, feeling like there will never be enough time with them. It is cleaning up their throw up, or just rubbing their back when they are sick. It is the dirtiest, hardest, most rewarding job there is.
Because at the end of the day you get to crawl into bed with your best friend, the weirdest, most annoying, loving, goofy, perfect person that you know. Marriage is not beautiful, but it is one heaven of a ride. ❤️

What you allow will continue..

Having a doormat is good… Being one????
NOT SO GOOD!!!!
What you allow will continue…
If you think about it, what in the world could possibly be more motivational and empowering than knowing that we are always in complete control of what we allow into our lives…
I will take that a step further…
I believe that if we remember this very powerful saying and live the truth in these words on a daily basis, our lives and our world would become more positive in an instant.
But let’s be real.
Lots of people know that it is true, but they keep allowing the same nonsense to flow into their lives anyway. Predictably, what will continue to faithfully show up in their lives is more of the garbage that they are trying to avoid.
Maybe you are one of those people.
I know that I used to be. Actually, in many areas of my life, I still am that person.
I want this piece to serve as your wake-up call..
WAIT….
Scratch that, OUR wake-up call.
We are in this together.
Effective immediately, it is time for you, me, and anyone who is listening to these words to become more mindful of what we allow into our lives...
WE TEACH OTHER’S HOW TO TREAT US…
What are you allowing to continue in your life?
  • Are you allowing your significant other to treat you like a second-class citizen in your own home?
  • Is one of your “friends”…(I’m using that term loosely)… constantly taking advantage of your kindness and generosity?
  • Do you keep mentally divorcing your wife/husband only to moments later want to stay married because he or she says that’s what they want and again at that given point till the next fight….
  • Do you have a co-worker or boss who consistently treats you in a condescending manner?
  • Are you slowly destroying your health through unhealthy habits?
To cut straight to it, is there anyone in your life “(YES, INCLUDING YOU)” who is consistently treating you like down graded trash???
If so, the bad news is that you are the one allowing it to continue.
Yes, you!!!!
The good news is that you can stop allowing this too happen, but only when you are ready too….
So, are you ready?
I know i am….
Are you with me in taking a stand to protect YOU from anymore mental and emotional torture?
Sounds pretty simple right?
WRONG!!!!!
Unfortunately it’s not that simple, yes you heard right…
What we are allowing, will continue!!!
If you jump straight into fixing the situation rather than yourself first…
Sorry to be blunt, but it is just not that simple…
  • We either allow ourselves to have our kindness taken advantage of on a daily basis, or we DO NOT..
  • We either allow ourselves to spend the rest of our lives in jobs that slowly destroy our souls, or we DO NOT..
  • We either allow ourselves to stay in abusive and/or loveless relationships, or we DO NOT..
  • We either believe in ourselves and our dreams, or we DO NOT..
  • We either allow ourselves to abuse the only body that we will ever have, or we DO NOT..
  • We either allow ourselves to believe our excuses about why we allow ourselves to be treated like dirt, or we DO NOT..
Just in case anyone is rolling their eyes right now, or muttering to him/herself , this lady just does not get it….
Let me be painfully clear about something.
Just because it is simple does not mean that it will be easy.
That is simply because making the world a more positive place is not easy..
Only the serious need to apply for that gig.
The decision to honor ourselves is a simple one. However, in order to make that decision a reality, it will require some very hard work.
It may very well be the hardest thing that we will ever do in our lives..
Mainly because doing so will mean that we will have to completely reject our excuses..
I personally know of a lot of people who have stayed in miserable, loveless, and even abusive relationships. Relationships that should have ended years ago, but they stayed in those relationships solely because of their kids.
Do not become another statistic my sweet…
Is that any reason to stay???
Do these kids NOT get even more messed up just by us as parents stay, using them as thee excuse, and my emphasis being “EXCUSE”….
This excuse deserves some serious rethinking.
Given the choice, is it not much better for kids to come from a broken home rather than live in one??
Spouses spending their days either giving each other the ice-cold silent treatment, screaming/cursing at each other, or sleeping in separate rooms.
In my opinion, kids are much more aware of these things than we give them credit for, and subjecting them to that kind of environment repeatedly cannot be the healthiest thing in the world.
In the end, we can dream up as many excuses as we want..
Worse of all we actually end up believing a few of those excuses too.
Unfortunately, there is NO EXCUSE in the world that can change the unshakable truthfulness of this…
“WHAT WE ALLOW IS WHAT WILL CONTINUE”
It may take a lot of work to cut out toxic people from our lives, it is even harder work making the conscious choice, honoring and loving ourselves unconditionally, but even if it is hard work, it cannot be any harder than allowing ourselves to be constantly treated like dirt, every other second, of each passing day… right?????
Don’t over-complicate this for another second.
Honoring yourself is simpler than you think.
If you are currently allowing yourself to experience a life that is less than what you know you deserve, it is worth it to ask yourself this very difficult, and non-sugarcoated, questions…
What will it take for me to no longer accept this pain or the scraps that life is offering me???
Do i not deserve better???
I have had to ask myself those very questions on many occasions, and having looked deep within, it woke me up from years (YES, very painful years) of making excuses instead of taking ownership over my life..
Blame becomes easy, but have you stopped to ask yourself…
WHO IS REALLY TO BLAME, him/her for the abuse, or YOU for allowing it to continue… Food for thought hmmmm..
How many more years are we willing to lose?
Years that we will never get back..
Mind you dealing with mindless drama, emotional abuse, disrespect are far worse on a constant basis….
Please believe that if you continue to allow yourself to be treated like dirt, you will eventually be introduced to the agonizing pain of never again…
This pain will change your life for the better, but it will hurt unlike any emotional pain that you have ever experienced in your life.
The good news is that once you experience this life altering pain, there is no excuse in the world that will stop you from doing the right thing.. MAKE SENSE???
The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. The gift of life is yours. It is an amazing journey, and you alone are responsible for the quality of it… You are the author of your story so make it a good one, make it a story no-one will want to put down…
But most importantly always let the core of your story revolve only around Allah…
Need only Allah..
Trust only Allah..

A woman of unexplainable strenght..

She rejoices in ALLAH with a grateful heart and a joyful spirit
She possesses the ability to genuinely say to another woman:
“I admire your qualities and attributes”
She is blessed with the gift of giving and a willingness to help others
She consoles others even though she too is hurting
She learns from her mistakes and acknowledges that she too is not perfect
She speaks with words of wisdom and not malice
From the mouths of destruction, her smile remains unshaken
She lifts her head and continues to walk in the midst of turmoil
She inspires other women to be the best they can be
With her life experiences, she touches the lives of a multitude
She remains determined to be the best person SHE can be
She smiles every time she says “I LOVE YOU”
She has the courage to take the fall for another
She is not too proud to say “I need you”
When her tears fall, she prays faithfully
When others turn their back on her, she still continues to pray faithfully
She is humble enough to admit when she is wrong
Through betrayal and talk, she remains secure in knowing who she is
She is loving enough to say “I forgive you”
She is at peace with herself without having the need to prove herself to anyone
She values her self-worth and reminds other women of theirs
She is not pretentious but instead she presents herself just as she is…
“A WOMAN OF STRENGTH”
THE ONLY WOMAN I BELIEVE, DESERVE THIS KIND OF PRAISE IS NONE OTHER THAN OUR MOTHER’S….
MAY ALLAH TA’ALLAH GRANT US DAUGHTERS THE HIDAYAH, TO GO THROUGH THIS BORROWED LIFE WITH HAYA AND CEMENTED IMAAN AND THE ABILITY
TO BE HALF THE WOMAN OUR MOTHER’S ARE

I AM WOMAN..

I get into an argument with a man, he slaps me… I feel the pain …
You provoked him …
You should have been quiet…
You looked for it…
… Apologise, they say???

Did ALLAH fashion me out of stone? Am i supposed to roll over and play dead because I’m a woman????
I get into an argument with a man, I slap him…
You have no respect, they hurl at me in anger…
Is this the upbringing your parents gave you…
You need to remember your place, they say…
Apologize they say…
Because i am a woman, i do not have a right to anger. So the degree of my innocence, is directly proportional to the degree of my silence, in the face of oppression and brutality….
Because i am a woman, my husband cheats on me, accusingly questioned as though i have sinned, well what have you done to provoke this, my son would never do that, well one woman to another, would you allow this to happen to your very own daughter?????
They tell me to tolerate and overlook, divorce is not an option, you will save this marriage, The barbaric and lame excuse, men are weak, it is in their nature. Lose weight they say, dress better, pray a little harder and no matter what be more pleasant to him he will come around…
Seriously… In Allah’s name…
Okay girl take a step back, you got this … Just breath #sigh
I receive love and attention and to them i am a cheat.. I am belittled and disgraced, because someone thinks I deserved to be loved… To them i am irresponsible and unfaithful…
Unfaithful for love that came to me….
Am i not human i ask?
If he had the right to break such sacred vows, why am i to pay the price by simply existing and not living?
Am i stone i ask, am i not human????
They send me packing, from the home we both built, with all my earthly possessions stuffed in a box, that you stuck together, and you are woman too, how can you do this to one woman when you are woman too i ask????
I am forbidden from seeing this man now, a man you gave authority to wrong…
Three years have gone by so painfully, with such shame and so much of verbal brutality… I have become cheap because i decided i too am important, I am not worthy as a woman because i choose to be who God created me to be, i was wrong for wanting to be loved, yet mother of his you asked me with disgust that horrid day “what have you done to make him do this”???
He is 30 plus and runs a company now, to the public he’s known as wonderful, hardworking, focused, career orientated, successful at a very young age… But wait…
Does nobody see that he is still a womanizer?????
I am 37, i run my own company, depend on only my Lord for provision, i am successful, i too am career orientated and hardworking…. But as i walk by all i hear is, she is not even married, so unserious about life, no priorities, a real hustler, she loves money, wait till she finds a husband he will put her in her place…

All i can do is laugh… Yes at 37 i am single, but happy… i make my own hustle and i do prioritise… and no i will never need a man to define me… not let negivity bring me down, i wonder how these people can assume success is based on one’s gender????

Because i am a woman, i am not allowed to be witty or to be a prodigy, i am not allowed success or to be financially buoyant…. Because i am a woman i do not deserve respect without a man by my side???
I am classed cheap, a run around. They never see the possibility that i actually had to go through so much, the ups, the downs, the highs, the lows to get to where i am today????
Because i am a woman!!!!
A man looses a wife through death and remarried just weeks later, he did the right thing????
  • A woman looses her husband through death and decided to remarry once her kids are married off and settled and she becomes so they say “hard up for a man”… she must have been jolling with him when hér husband was still alive… she must have had something to do with his death that witch…
Why does a man get praised for moving on with life, yet a woman’s name and reputation gets tarnished..
Because she is a woman???
Because i am a woman the piece that i have just related to you, will be considered controversial, you will want to correct me.. But let’s not forget that i am a woman and it does not make me less human ….
Truth or Lie…..
I AM WOMAN….

There is always a way..

You are all alone..
You feel like you are the only one on earth that has to deal with all of this hardship and pain, all these obstacles being placed in your path..
You sit back in the dark and you cry, you sob from deep down, no-one seems to understand the silent questions written all over your face..
You look over to your right, your prayer mat placed neatly on the bedside chair, you look up at the shelf above your bed, your Quran in that very fancy case you just had to have, full of dust and untouched. You want so badly to make that change, you so desperately want to make all this hurt go away…
Closing your eyes you take a deep breath and even though it hurts you take that breath anyway, it is killing you to think of how you had been saved on a daily basis, but chose to be blind to HIS presence..
You realise that you had to now take back what you turned away from, you know that turning to Allah, you will never be let down nor would you fall without assistance in getting back up..
You walk over to the wash basin, look into the mirror and say to yourself that this is the only way..
You make wudhu..
Sitting on that very musallah you refused to touch, you lift your hands and start making that much needed dua..
Asking Allah to save You, to fill your life with barakah and Rahma..
You beg Allah to protect you from shaitaan and his whisperings..
You feel a sense of ease because you know that you have now chosen a path that will Grant you all the contentment you so desired..
Mixed emotions, you feel afraid..
This new journey is a journey not for the faint at heart..
But you choose to have faith, you feel your imaan getting stronger..
You want the change, so you sit back, to relate and reminisce on all the vices that made you stray and you now realise that by turning to Allah, HE will never let you down, HE will never let you fall..
With a heavy heart and eyes full of tears, you lift your hands and you make dua, do not be afraid, have faith and take the leap, because Allah will never let you fall…
I need You
I trust you
My love is just for You
My Allah i promise today never to put anything above you..
Oh my Allah I need you, my Allah I need you..

Living VS Existing..

You just go through the day and feel as if you cannot change your life for the better?

Everything has been decided for you and you have no choice in what you do, wear or say?
Most days can feel like that.
You feel like you are drifting aimlessly through life.
Then there are those who wake up with a new type of buzz every morning, almost like a surge of energy has given them a powerful jolt for the day. They have things they look forward to and they do not know what is going to happen to them in the future nor do they have a care in the world, now these are the type of people who do not merely exist, but are also full of life..
Living vs. Existing
I think the biggest distinction between living and existing comes from how much control you have over life decisions.
Where do you see control coming from?
In general, someone who exists feels as if everything is outside of their control while someone living knows they determine the path their lives take…
Emotions have a big role to play in this. Someone who merely exists lets their emotions such as fear and anger dictate what they can and cannot do. Someone who is living understands these emotions, controls them and they do not let those emotions interfere with their decisions.
Someone who exists would stay in the same dead-end job for years despite being unsatisfied and unhappy. Their fears have trapped them and they have no plans of getting out. They have lost hope and just mindlessly go through the day in order to maintain the status quo.
But it goes much further than a job and salary. Someone who lets their fears control them will not take other actions that would improve their lives. They stay in relationships they do not like, never do things on their bucket/wish list and always put their dreams on hold.
People who simply exist exercise the same boring routine every day even though they do not really like it. They do not take any chances on improving their lives just so they can maintain their current comfortable lifestyle. This is because they are unable to take control of their decisions.
How to Stop Existing and Start Living
So how would you even know if you are someone who exists or lives?
Try this every morning, wake up each morning, look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the same question, “If I was to die today, would I do what I am about to do?” If your answer is no too many days in a row, you need to make a change…
I think this is a good starting point especially for figuring out if you are just settling for just being an amateur…
If you are not getting excited or happy most days with what you are going to do, you need to take action and change something. This goes for every area of your life
Your attitude will change when describing, “someone who is living”…
You will not be content with doing a routine simply because you have done it the day before…
You will have to keep finding something that is meaningful to you and that brings you joy…
Otherwise you stop getting up in the morning because you want to and you start getting up because it becomes an obligation…
Once you know what you want to change, you will have to confront those fears holding you back and remind yourself that a change is now compulsory….
I realize this can be a scary process, I went through something similar… Many years ago I had a job I did not like. It was not horrible, but after several months of work I realized I had started going there only because of habit and not because I liked the work itself…
I knew I needed a change so after losing my dad I quit…
I had searched for other forms of employment, but still nothing that satisfied me….
It was really scary at first, but I knew quitting was the right thing to do. Today, I am glad I made the decision.
Be in Control of Your Life
In the end, you need to be the one making the decisions for your life. Nothing should tell you what to do, even your fears and doubts. If you have not already, you need to take back control and make life meaningful for yourself once again.
I know it can be easy to get stuck doing something because it is comfortable and has become habitual…
Do you think you are living or existing?
Are there things you have become comfortable with and need to change?

Choosing to live with an Attitude of Gratitude.. The gift of sight.. A beautiful flower..

Another stressful week had come to a very slow close..
Having completed her task of compiling her notes for that week, she slumped into her chair and stared blankly out her office window, a million and three thoughts running aimlessly through her mind..
Mentally, physically and emotionally fatigued, She was so over that week, and after the agonising day she had, all she could think of was getting out that creepy office building…
She sprung up got her stuff together and bid farewell to the dreary office walls and made her way out… As she stepped out onto the streets, into the midst of the chaos of everyday life, her feet pulled in one direction and one direction only…
A place she would find herself every time she knew she so desired contentment… The one place she knew she would find her calm… And so she walked…
To her luck her favorite park bench under the big old oak was deserted, quickly drawing closer, she sat down, hoping in that moment she would finally find some peace and quiet..
Under the long, straggly branches of the old oak tree..
Disillusioned by life, with what she thought was good reason to frown..
For she had believed that this cruel, cruel world had intention of dragging her down.. And as if that were not enough to ruin her day…
An unfamiliar young boy, panting and almost out of breath approached her, all exhausted from his play..
He raced up and stopped dead in his tracks, in her face, smiling shyly, his head tilted downward…
And said with the greatest of excitement, in that very moment nearly knocking her out her seat with shock…
“Look at what i found!”
He yelled with joy…
In his hand was a flower…
What an ugly, pitiful sight…
With every petal all wornout… Not enough rain, or too little light…
At that moment wanting so badly for him to leave her alone, needing him to take his dead flower and go back to his play…
She faked a small smile and then shuffled herself a little further away…
Instead of backing away, he sat next to her, sliding closer, placing the flower to his nose and declaring with overacted surprise…
“It sure smells pretty and it is beautiful, too…
That is why i picked it, here, this is for you…”
The weed she held in her hand was dying or close to dead…
Not vibrant of colors…
No orange, yellow or red…
She knew she was forced to take it or he would never leave…
So she reached for the flower, and replied, thank you,” this is just what i need…”
But instead of him placing the flower in her hand, he held it mid-air without reason or plan…
It was only then that she realised for the very first time, that this very young weed-loving boy could not see…
Oh my..
This energetic, life living little boy was blind…
She heard my voice quiver, tears shone in the sun, as she thanked him for picking thee most beautiful one…
“You are very welcome,” he smiled, and then in a swift jump, he was up and ran off to play, unaware of the impact he had had on her day…
She sat there in awe and wondered how he managed to see, a self-pitying woman beneath the old oak tree…
How did he know of her self-indulged plight?
Perhaps from his heart, he had been blessed with true sight…
Through the eyes of a blind child, at last she could see… She said to herself feeling so horribly low, the problem was not with the world, but the problem lied with me…
And for all of those times she chose to be blind…
She now vowed to see the beauty in life…
And appreciate every second that was to be hers…
She held the wilted flower up to her nose…
Closed her eyes and took a deep breath of the fragrance of a beautiful rose…
And smiled as she watched that blessed young boy, another weed in his hand…
About to change the life of an unsuspecting old man…
The moral of my piece today is…
EVERYTHING HAS BEAUTY, BUT NOT EVERYONE SEES IT…

You are treasured by Almighty..

Almost every one of us feels unimportant to be worthy of consideration, from time to time…
You may be great in one thing and yet helpless hopeless in the next, you may just be thee girl/guy of the show with one crowd and totally invisible to another.
Insignificance has more to do with how we feel about ourselves rather than our real value as individuals, in saying this i mean, what self-worth you portray is how people will perceive you.

FEELINGS VS FACTS:
We tend to feel somewhat worth less when people do not take notice or acknowledge us.. Are we really worth less, have we really become so dependent on what others think about or feel toward us?
You say it is hard to stand up and be noticed when we feel alone in a room full of people. I say stand tall and feel proud. Because at that point you may feel alone, but there is someone in that very room that sees and envies your true value, someone who wishes that they could have been the amazing, creative, loving soul that you are, every individual possesses some quality or trait that someone wishes they had, for some reason we always want to be better than who we envy, in actual fact we need to strive toward being the best version of us and that is all there is too it…
Feeling insignificant really hurts but regardless of our feelings, we do have real value. We are fashioned in Allah’s image, and he our most loved Allah created us for great things, sadly we change that Destiny by doing everything unpleasing to Allah..
Life chips away at our souls, but Allah sees us as priceless, worthy creations so why short change ourselves, we are imperfectly perfect and that to Allah is a true believer with strong imaan…
So much so, that Allah sends down most precious angels each time we make dua sincerely, to take our plea’s and our cries directly to HIM so HE can Grant us solace, serenity and everything HE thinks is best suited for us.
HOW ALLAH SEES US:
Allah sees us as an incredibly amazing valuable human beings..
Allah sees past our hurt and pain and through that sums up our real worth..
Better still, Allah is ready to take away the mess our lives have become and offer us healing and forgiveness for whatever wrong we have done, intentionally or not..
Instead of feeling insignificant, we can feel treasured by Allah. We can know and feel the joy of belonging.

YOU ARE TREASURED BY ALLAH:
When we receive Allah’s gift of forgiveness, we discover that we were chosen, hand selected by Allah.
That mercy and forgiveness leads to where we are valued and value others.
Instead of feeling invisible in that crowd, we understand that Allah sees us and our needs every moment of every single day..
START AND END YOUR DAY WITH THIS DUA:
Oh my beloved Allah, I am truly sorry for the wrongs i have committed. I am tired of feeling unimportant, please uplift my status Ya Rabb. I want to have a true relationship with you my most loved Allah. Please become the light to all of this darkness that has surrounded me. Shukran Ya Rabb for seeing the value in me and for helping me realise that all i have ever needed and will ever need is you. Help me to see myself through your eyes. Guide me and direct me onto the path that is most pleasing to you my Allah. For only your love and understanding of me is what i live for. Ya Allah help me to have a forgiving heart, especially to those who think low of me, give me sabr to endure their oppressive behaviour. Ya Allah forgive those who devalue innocent people for their own image, Grant them and us all hidayah to be better people. Ameen Ya Rabbul Alameen..

The pain you experience today is shaping for you the strenght you own tomorrow..

It is when you have woken up with a full day ahead of you after only two hours of sleep.
It is when there is nothing for you to do but stand by your friends as they deal with painful dillema’s and all the obstacles we have thrown in our paths…
It is when you do not know how to handle the situations in your life that are anything but black and white.
It is when you feel utterly helpless and powerless as you watch someone you care about aching with deep soul wounds that only come from losing the person that comprised the other half of their heart.
It is when your own heart feels as though it has been crushed beyond recognition over and over again.
It is when your path is entirely unclear and you do not know if the next step is solid ground or off a cliff.
It is when you are not sure if the decisions you made are the right ones or maybe not the right ones.
It is when it looks as though the world is irrevocably falling apart.
It is when it seems like people are becoming more and more disconnected, lonely, and afraid.
It is when you feel as though there is no way you can even begin to help fix any of it.
It is when you realize that, in spite of it all, you really are smart and strong enough to make it through step by step…
It is when you realize that just when you thought you had nothing left to give, you discover you actually have everything to give and much more.
It is when you want to give up on it all, but find that one thing that drives you to keep going.
It is easy to love and give and feel happy and alive when things are going well, when we feel as though the world is our oyster. But what happens when life feels as though it is caving in with a spirit crushing weight?
The past few months have been filled with many painful heart breaking events, recurrence of cancer being the scariest of them and at this point I asked myself do I sink or do I continue swimming??? Hoping along the way that Allah sends positivity or even glad tidings my way….
I chose to continue swimming!!!!
There would come times when we feel exhausted, burnt out, and desperately wanting to quit. At times like this, remember the goal and stay focused.
I remember that pain and discomfort are temporary, and the strength, endurance, flexibility, and functionality I am gaining is invaluable.
Working through life’s issues may seem like an insignificant comparison to major life events, the psychological training is the same. What you tell yourself in moments that seem unimportant is what re-emerge when things get hard…
As the saying goes, “You don’t rise to the level of your expectations, you fall to the level of your training.”
You do not grow when things are easy and effortless. You grow when you are being challenged, sometimes beyond what you think you are capable of handling.
We carry ideas of what we think loving and living are until something comes along and redefines how we see it all. Sometimes it redefines it by making it appear as though it’s completely broken or entirely gone.
But you know what the beautiful part of it all is?
Just because we think something is broken does not mean that it cannot be mended in some way.
Just because we think we cannot see something does not mean it is not there. The world around us reminds us of it all the time. The sun, moon, and stars silently show us that they exist even when there is too much in the way to see them…
It is not easy. It is really, really hard. In fact, sometimes it looks nearly impossible. How are we supposed to gather our scattered bits of resolve to rebuild the will to keep moving forward when all we really want to do is curl up and hide from the world?
It is those times we have to step aside and heal in whatever way we can, and in that time, remember find what keeps us going.
It is when we think we have no reason left to love, and sometimes when we question our very existence, that we have to allow ourselves to find and create a whole new beauty from what may have felt like an end.
Those who have endured some misfortune will always be set apart but it is just that misfortune which is their gift and which is their strength.
If we are open to the lessons from our hardship, misfortune, and heartbreak they will inevitably build within us an increasingly unshakable compassion, understanding, and love.
Losing so much of what i loved and watching as friends contend with their own losses, I have learned that when it seems things not be any worse, that is when it is most important to gather every last bit of will, courage and heart, forge the faith and never stop believing that love and life are worth every single moment.
Even those that break our hearts…
Hitting rock bottom emotionally, means that there is only way left.. And that is the way back up, claw your way up if you must, but get up nevertheless, if you slip back down, get up and keep moving till you see that silver lining again…
Those painful times should teach you how to live again, how to give again, those moments you so wish to forget should teach you how to love again…

The Foundation of Love.. Releasing Judgement & Expectations.. “12 Feb 2017”

“Love is saying, ‘I feel differently, instead of you are wrong…”
We seek it, want it, need it, genuine heart-felt unconditional love yet it eludes so many of us…
Not infatuation, lust, or what you think makes you happy, but true intimacy at the level of your soul.
How do we create deep authentic connections with those who matter most?
Love seems to come in precious moments that we cannot seem to grasp before time and our busy lives takes their toll…
Must we try so hard to make love work?
Is love not just meant to flow?
We hear about unconditional love, that we must learn to love ourselves first before we can love another. It requires something so simple, yet difficult in practice, letting go of making ourselves, and others, wrong…
When you keep pointing out someone else’s wrong doings, you hold the negative energy of needing to correct, convince, control, or change (the 4 C’s, as i call them)…
Someone should be or do things the way you expect them too…
Blaming, complaining, or condemning becomes acceptable.
When You, yourself wrong or err, you hold thoughts of how you should be, and end up feeling just not worth it…
We now see ourselves and others as objects or problems that need to be fixed….
My parents, worked hard and instilled strong values of kindness, respect, and the intense imperative need for education… It was critical we as kids had education and something to fall back on… However i did learn the very painful way that watching what an elder sibling does is not always the way to go… So i followed my father’s teachings instead and learned what was right and wrong, words of wisdom from a poor man who’s wealth was his extremely massive heart and silent knowledge.
I lead a happy personal and professional life today…
Married with virtually zero drama or conflict, and have the most amazing extended family…
We look forward to visits, and numerous all sorts get togethers as I like to call it…
Surprisingly, it turned out that I have become quiet the exception, having grown from a naive young female to a woman of substance…
I attribute the harmony i experience to my dad who gave of himself like no other with an uncanny ability to not complain about anything… He was one smart, highly productive, intriguing man.
Logical with astounding common sense, he instilled in me high self esteem, the secret ingredient to happiness…
What about love?
It did not need to be expressed to certainly know I was loved. Yet something was missing.
There was criticism and judgment growing up I could not see, right and wrong and good and bad. It was not just in my family, it was everywhere.
Expectations of how i was expected to behave, what I was supposed to know, who i was expected to be, and the kind of person I was expected to marry became very clear…
Now having dedicted my life to helping others, I suddenly find myself on a very spiritual path. I started learning things that did not fit with my “family norms.” I quickly learned what I could no longer share. And the gravest lesson of all was learning that there is nothing more powerful than my silence… And my prayer …
Harmony exists because everyone knows what to say and what not say. The moment I decided to step out of my “family box,” something shifted. My happiness grew, and I unexpectedly discovered what unconditional love meant. I learnt that happiness is a changing state of being, and love can be experienced on many different levels.
But what about things people say and do that have destructive consequences?
Many believe love is putting up with, sacrificing, tolerating, or suffering in silence, thinking their commitment is proof of their love. This is not love.
Understanding, seeing, hearing, and accepting someone for who they are is love.
When you have the burning need to keep at proving someone wrong, there is a value you hold being stepped on. It is black and white in your mind, but in between lives everyone else’s perception of truth.
Someone not living up to your value of “hard work” you may judge as “lazy.” Someone who does not follow your idea of “giving” you may judge as “selfish.” Someone you judge as “inconsiderate” is not acting in a way you see as “kindness.”
Notice how it feels when others project their values onto you. The question is not whether someone is right or wrong, but whether the words and actions are coming from the spectrum of fear on one side or love on the other. The result will be either constructive or destructive.
Extreme fear breeds hatred leading to very destructive consequences that shaytaan created in the world he lived in. Extreme love leads to compassion, and what Allah ta’allah created in the world we live in.
When you let go of needing others to live according to your “right” way, you realize how others respond is simply a projection of their reality.
A shift can now happen away from your fear-based ego toward love and compassion, where you can seek to understand, share, teach, and model. Trying to be patient is next to impossible in the place of fear, but shift to love and you will find all the patience you need.
We are all seeking truth, but truth is in the eye of the beholder. Discernment not judgment leads you to truth by getting curious and noticing whether someone’s perception of reality comes from love or fear. It’s the difference between competition and cooperation, doubt and trust. It will lead to holding on or letting go…
You stand in a place of superiority when you judge and see others as inferior. It is a destructive energy of being attached to “I am right” that you project onto someone else. Notice that what comes back will be defensiveness because no one believes they are “wrong.” Criticism is also being attached to “I am right,” but you don’t necessarily see someone as inferior.
The Golden Rule found in all spiritual teachings: Are you treating someone the way you want to be treated? Who wants to be treated to criticism and judgment?
When you let go of convincing, correcting, controlling, and trying to change others, you release a big illusion in love, ownership.
Your ego can convince you that belonging to someone is wonderful, but it’s the opposite. Having the independence to share your true self and allow others the same brings true intimacy.
No one makes you happy; happiness is found within. Until you live in compassion with yourself, the love you give will be conditional.
We are each a unique expression raised from birth to the present day living our truth based on our own values, beliefs, experience, and understanding. In every given moment we can only be and do our best. Your best will not be the same as someone else’s best.
We cling to love wanting it to last forever, but it cannot for we are the ones carrying that love, and we are constantly evolving.
The love we share is either growing together or growing apart. The paradox is love can grow apart, but it can also grow stronger.
I married someone who fit the idea of what I thought was “right,” and my awareness at that time of what I thought would bring me happiness. It has.
I thought this was love, but it was conditional, and that’s why it felt like something was missing. Now I know differently, and there is a lot more authenticity. We are closer than we have ever been… Alhamdulillah!!!
The secret to experiencing deeper love is allowing each other to grow.
Today, I experience the most profound sense of love I have ever known.
I havee learnt that love is wanting others to be happy without it needing it to be about you. This is how I know I love my husband, and everyone who loves me intensely with no condition and no agenda. They are not dependent on me for their happiness, and I am not dependent on them for mine.
It is when I can show up without criticism and judgment and I allow them to be exactly who they are that love is exchanged.
Unconditional love does not always come from the family we were born into because criticism, judgment, and the resulting expectations are a big part of family culture.
Family love is strong, lasting, and nothing compares, but experiencing unconditional love will often require you to break free from the family circle to follow your heart, and your own truth.
True love is eternal even if a relationship grows apart. When you surrender judgement, you will see the divine in everyone, including you.
NOW MY DEAR ONE THIS IS LOVE…

Judge NOT.. Love ALOT!!!

We have always been told that we should never judge a book by its cover. Of course, most of the time when that statement is made we are not talking about books. We are talking about judging other people. The truth is, until i open the book and see what is inside, i cannot really know what it is about except by its cover. Until i get to know someone i only have their outward appearance to be a guide for what is inside. I think it is appropriate to judge paper books by their covers.. But in all honesty is this the way we should treat people?
As far as my personal testimony before others are concerned, i want my appearance and actions to coincide with who i really am inside at least as much as possible..
However, sometimes people are in situations that do not allow them the privilege of showing on the surface what is underneath.
Maybe someone does not have the financial means to adorn themselves in a way that shows how loving and kind they are. It could also be that past decisions have left them in a physical condition that limits their ability to present themselves in a way that is in line with their internal desires..
Whatever the reason for a disconnect between appearance and person, we should be careful not to prejudge others.
Judging before we know the facts is called prejudice.
While we typically think of that word being applied to people from a different place or background than us, it is a perfectly good word to describe the act of being judgmental.
Judging before we know the facts is called prejudice, here are 7 ways can you become more loving and less judgmental..
Be Aware of Your Prejudices
Take note of what causes you to make judgment before knowing facts.. Sometimes it is easier to see these things in others.While you may not have the same prejudices as they have, you probably have tendencies that way. Then look at your own situations and try to see the things that push your negative buttons.By being aware of these tendencies, you are on your way to conquering them. Constantly remind yourself that you don’t have to go down a judgmental path towards others
Try to See the Other Person’s Perspective
Understand the other person’s perspective and situation, however it is imperative to remember that if you follow through with an action which will bring you negative publicity, avoid those types of decisions and actions, after all prevention is better than cure..
Allow ALLAH to Work in You
We love the idea of jumping on our high horses and calling things out, even if what we call out are lowly mannered lies.. By allowing Allah into our hearts and making decisions that are pleasing to him, will grant gratification as well as the ability to judge less
Allow Others the Freedom You so badly desire
We hear a lot of talk of tolerance by people who really want the freedom to live however they feel and without rules. Yet, those same people do not practice tolerance towards those who do want to live by personal, religious, or legal codes. Dont get me wrong, I am not advocating the typical meaning of “tolerance.”
Does this mean you cannot teach and help?
No! In fact, we should all be trying to help others grow with aqlaaq and maturity..
And this we need to do it with love. The arrogant mindset that says, “I am the only one who knows how to do anything right,” is not a loving one and won’t help you to overcome judgmental thoughts. And, furthermore, won’t actually help you teach anyone.
Realize that not every Personality is the same
It is easy to say that we understand people have different personalities, but sometimes it is hard to actually take that into account when dealing with other individuals..
Not Everyone Knows What You Know..
Nor do you know what others do, see the balance???
Be patient with others who may not be as educated or spiritually mature as you. And realize that you are probably not the most mature person in every relationship. Give others time to grow. Someone was patient with you. It is your turn to be patient with others.
Keep your expectations in check..
So often we judge outcomes based on expectations. Are you as amazed And happy as i am when i hear of someone’s succes..
When you set your expectations for others very high, then you are likely to be disappointed when they don’t perform as well as you hoped.
Of course, you can also look at others and expect very little from them. This is equally as bad. This causes an elitist attitude that looks critically unethical and unprofesional..

Going Forward..

When meeting new people or entering into new situations, we need to be discerning and wise. But do not allow that discernment to turn into critical, judgmental and prejudiced thoughts. Allow each situation to unfold and be flexible with whatever the outcome without presupposing what each person in the cast should do based on your own expectations.
Shower everything you do in unconditional love..
This is a great filter for how to view others and their actions.
Don’t throw away the entire fruit basket because of a few distasteful inedible fruit, clean it out & enjoy the goodness within, like the most beloved prophet did … Follow the path of the chosen one…

Almighty fashioned us with selfishness as an exam… Will we pass??? Or will we fail???

Almighty has created the human soul with a predisposition to selfishness as a test. Unless he lives by the moral values of the Qur’an and tames his earthly desires, this feeling will come to dominate his whole moral framework.
Such a person generally thinks of himself alone, rather than everyone else. He always wants the best, finest and most perfect of everything for himself. He wants to have possessions and children and for his own family merely to be comfortable. In face of difficulties, he will expect the people around him to undergo all kinds of risks and troubles for him and to support him, even at the cost of their own interests. He seeks to protect his own whims and interests and to ensure his own ease and comfort.
When the situation is different he can forgo many things he values, for the sake of protecting his own interests and preventing any harm coming to him.
Allah has revealed this passionate selfish feeling in human earthly desires as follows in the Qur’an: “Truly man was created headstrong – desperate when bad things happen, begrudging when good things come.” (Qur’an, 70:19-21)
They are a major threat to modern societies. The materialist thinking that is widespread in modern societies that do not live by religious moral values, reinforces the selfish and egotistical spirit in human nature and disseminates a “me-first” philosophy. Indeed, the idea of “So long as I’m all right, who cares what happens to anyone else?” or “Looking out for number one” generally dominates such societies.
Thus, oppressed and poor people; their children devoid of education or food, are of no interest to such people. This social structure generally leads to a troubled and unhappy atmosphere.
Only people living by the moral values of the Qur’an can bring about any change in such a contaminated society, only they can change the people of selfish interest — those who protect their own interests and violate everyone else’s, and who have no love or fear of Allah.
Islam cultivates love of Allah and which is the only way to acquire such values of good conscience as compassion and helpfulness, which are at the root of the Qur’anic moral values.
Fear and love of Allah enables people to submit themselves to Him, to see the best in everything and to have compassion. In the verses Allah reveals how the only interest of concern to believers is His approval: “They fulfill their vows and fear a Day whose evil will spread far and wide. They give food, despite their love for it, to the poor and orphans and captives: ‘We feed you only out of desire for the Face of Allah. We do not want any repayment from you or any thanks. Truly We fear from our Lord a glowering, calamitous Day.’ So Allah has safeguarded them from the evil of that Day and has made them meet with radiance and pure joy.” (Qur’an, 76:7-11)
Our Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “He who goes to bed full when his neighbor is hungry is not one of us.” It is an important warning to all those believers who desire to earn Allah’s approval. Therefore, anyone aiming to earn Allah’s approval will not just settle for a solution to his own problems; he will also assume responsibility for resolving the problems of others around him in need.
This may of course require people to give up things they love or to sacrifice their own comfort. The way that Muslims look to protect and watch over the poor by giving alms, help people in need by canceling their debts and spend their possessions on Allah’s path, rather than accumulating and hoarding them, are moral virtues bestowed by the ethical values of the Qur’an.
Responding to people’s needs and treating them kindly are forms of behavior that prevent atrophocation of the conscience. Empathizing with others, treating the needy with affection and showing respect and love make it possible to eliminate cruelty and selfishness. Verses reveal that the reward for good behavior comes in the Presence of Allah: “Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him. Be good to your parents and relatives and to orphans and the very poor, and to neighbors who are related to you and neighbors who are not related to you, and to companions and travelers and your slaves. Allah does not love anyone vain or boastful.” (Qur’an, 4:36)
Faith perfects people’s behavior, as it does so many other traits. A believer who constantly heeds his conscience as required by religious moral values will always behave in the best, most considerate, trust-inspiring and tolerant manner.
Someone possessed of these moral attributes has earned merit for his own life in the hereafter. At the same time, he is instrumental in freeing the world from its self-interested and selfish nature, and making it a place of the delights of Islam.

Relationship killers..

COMMUNICATION, TRUTHFULNESS, TAKING RESPONSIBILITY, WORK AND PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP MATTERS…

Today i would like if we concentrated on these very important keynotes..

Have you at some point started feeling like you are the resident dart board..
with no proof or evidence, everything you do and say with no second thought gets questioned and turned into a negative.
everything bad that HAPPENS becomes your fault, or The “because of you” one liner gets tossed around, you are an easy target because you choose to deal with every situation passively, then TODAY’S piece is just for you..
Perception:
We all process relationships, may it be work or personal, through our very own perceptions and in saying that, when we relate to someone only through our own perception, it becomes one-dimensional and a tad unfair, leaving us with a very warped view of reality.
As perception maybe a reality, it may not be, “actuality” or rather (living in reality). There is a big difference between ones perception and the raw truth. External influence and internal dialogue shape perception. No truth can ever be influenced, therefore the truth will remain just that to us all, the bitter truth. When incidents start getting related as we want it percieved, we lose sight of the actual picture, we become so fixated on only our story, and that becomes the biggest relationship killer of all time. Relationships need a 360-degree view to bloom. People outside the relationship who have nothing to lose or gain by bringing truth to the conversation can often help. This is the power of positive coaching.
Assumption:
We are all guilty of making assumptions of the people with whom we are in relationships with, like i said earlier, it could be work or personal. If i put away r5 for every time i heard “they always” or “they never”, i would be a millionaire. In most instances, we assume things about others without thinking of how our cheap behind close doors chit-chat would affect them nor do we take time out to ask them what reality or their side of the story is. And i find this most hilarious, as to how quick we are to jump on our high horses, that to with no fact, make assumptions and pass judgement based purely on what we may have heard or what we expect the truth to be. That right there is a class act relationship killer. Our assumptions are often based on our own experiences and perceptions. Right or wrong, this actually says more about you and your character than about the one, you judged or made an assumption about. Making an assumption, simply means passing judgement, good or bad. Off late i have been observing, “When people get defensive for a lie caught out, or offended about a truth, that is when the act of assuming and judging steps right in.” Many of our offences actually come from assumption and not from “really what happend” or simply “reality of a matter”. Someone may say something to you and because you assume you know what he or she meant, you get offended, create a scene without thinking first and when realise it was you that was wrong in the first place, you rather cut ties and sever the relationship. Instead, we should seek understanding, ask questions, or get advice from someone outside the relationship to see the full picture and gain full knowledge, from a perspective unknown to us rather than someone waiting to fuel heated coal.
Expectations:
We tend to expect alot from people we are in relationships with. The problem arises when we refuse to ask rather than rely on those expectations. Based on our perception and assumptions, we will often put an unachievable expectation on someone, to what we want, when we want because we can do just that, expect. Every relationship must have negotiation and communication within it to be healthy and have an understanding as well as the freedom to be able to set boundaries and still remain in that relationship, now that is the place to school each other on what to expect and what not to. When those expectations are not based on reality and agreement, they to become relationship killers and i say this because our expectations often come from a place of hurt or broken trust or simply the need to feel superior, it becomes impossible for the other person to achieve them. If we do not know what we want, how can we expect any other person to have knowledge of that? And that is were i recommend communication and agreement for clarity. This gives you both an opportunity to share your hearts and helps also achieving the expectation in UNITY.
Every relationship, regardless of the intimacy level, whether at work or home suffers from these three killers! We are not even aware we are doing this, it takes conscience effort to overcome the tendency.
Three transparent ways to bury relationship killers:
  1. Invite someone you trust and discuss your tendencies in these three areas with that person. Ask him or her to hold you accountable by pointing out when they see you doing it, privately of course. Meet regularly to go over or vent about your actions.
  2. Correct your mistakes by talking to the people you have offended in these ways. Ask for forgiveness and invite them to share their hearts so you can understand them better and also lean were you may have gone wrong. This is not easy, but very powerful.
  3. Soul-search, introspect and look deep within your heart to understand why you do this. Perhaps seek counsel to dig up some roots to allow healing to happen in your heart. When you deal with the deeper issues in your heart, these three relationship killers lose their power in your life.
I would like to end leaving you with this thought.
We do not have to look to far to see the pain that often comes from broken relationships, we have all experienced it. Rather then being defensive and hiding behind a lie to cover up your bad choice, work at it. Rather than putting others down to look good, work on were you went wrong and how you can fix it. If you know you are working hard and tirelessly, do not seek gratification from your peers, do not demand acknowledgement, rather let your hard work, success and silence speak for you, It is far less painful to work on these issues than it is to walk away. We all carry the baggage from the last relationship to the next one, so let’s us make sure it is good luggage.
Like i said last week, we are all merely dots on a very long line of dots that need to be in sync to create something unique and rare, and that can only be done by working in harmony but most importantly working honestly in sync with good intention with dots before and and after you. Be a humble, connect in a peaceful manner, no picture is ever complete if one dot suddenly goes out of sync.
Accept Fault when it is yours.
Let every mistake/bad choice you make be a stepping stone to the next good choice, and it is absolutely imperative that in any relationship we practise “Patience, Gratitude and the intention to constantly strive toward an honest intention”
Remember relationships do Matter…

Paradise.. A sincere prayer away!!!

We all make mistakes in our lives…. It’s only natural!!!
At some point or another, we do commit a sin or two, maybe even ten…
Knowingly or Unknowingly!!!
We are only human and without thought we tend to tread of the path for a while.
What do we do when we realise we were wrong?
How do we ensure that our repentance is sincere, consistent and successful?
THE MOST IMPORTANT ACTIONS WOULD BE TOO:
  1. Stop our wrongful deeds/actions.
  2. Show remorse deeply and truly for the sin committed. In this instant regret is a good thing.
  3. Return to Allah ta’allah for forgiveness.
  4. Make a strong intention never to repeat those actions.
  5. Lastly:
    If the sin involved infringing on the rights of other people, then we must return the infringed rights back to the individual to whom they belong.
Many people may find that their repentance begins strong, but then slowly gets weaker as it reached that peak of pure powerful tear filled dua and they fall back into committing the sin only a short while later. To ensure that we stay true to our repentance and keep our promises to Allah ta’allah, our Ibadah has to be consistent…
Believe that Allah ta’allah is Most Forgiving, Most Merciful
I have heard so many say “there’s no point in stopping my sin because I’ve wronged so much I don’t deserve Allah ta’Allah’s forgiveness, He will never forgive me.” If you are one of those people then STOP RIGHT THERE!!!
How can you think that way, when Allah ta’Allah says in the Holy Qur’an over and over again that He is All-Forgiving and Most Compassionate? How can you lose faith in Allah ta’Allah’s mercy? He created you and He knows your weaknesses and your faults. Everyone in the world makes mistakes, what makes you the best, is turning to Allah ta’Allah and begging most sincerely for His forgiveness..
We must never think that Allah ta’Allah will not ever forgive us. Repent with sincerity and remember that Allah ta’Allah loves His most obedient servants…
Allah ta’Allah will accept your plea for his forgiveness and mercy…
Pinpoint the Source of Your Sin
There are many types of sins. No matter how big or small a sin is, once we decide to give it up and want to successfully repent to Allah ta’Allah it is of utmost importance for us to locate the main source of this sin and keep away from it to the best of our ability. The source may be a friend, a certain place that you go to get away from it all, at your computer alone or watching tv alone. If the sin is related to the computer or the TV or other such appliances, we should not eliminate them completely from our lives. Instead we should try to find a way that helps us use these resources for good rather than evil. It is always good to try and have people around you when using these resources so that you feel stronger and surround yourself with people who remind you to stay on the right path, for it is always easy to go astray when alone and vulnerable.
If you find that the source of the sin is a friend, then you should cut ties with this friend. It will not always be an easy task, but rather of vital importance that it must be done, and do it for the sole pkeasure of Allah ta’allah and He will reward you immensely for it In sha Allah. Ameen.
If the sin is more like missing prayers or not fasting in Ramadan, we may try to pinpoint the reason we commit the sin. It may be, that your mind is occupied with other things which are distracting you from the fundamental worship of Allah ta’Allah, In this case we should try to eliminate these distractions from our lives or try to organise our time to sustain balanced lives which include our ibadah into our lives daily. Using the daily taskinator to plan and organise your day, can really help you stay on track with keeping your Ibadah in check.
Rally Your Support Team
The people around you have a huge impact on the way you behave. At a time when you want to repent to Allah ta’allah and you sincerely feel bad about the sins that you have committed, you don’t want to be alone. You may find that your family can be a HUGE support for you at times like this. They can remind you of what you are trying to do. They will listen to you and support you through all your struggles to give up your sin.
Friends are also really important. I cannot stress enough how important it is to choose your friends wisely. Peer pressure is real. Even if you think that you are strong and you will not fall again, your friends can pressure you into returning to what you used to do.
Your friends should be those who support you in whatever you do and better yet, they join you and work with you towards the goal of becoming a better person. They encourage you to attend lectures and workshops, and join you in volunteering for good causes.
The believing men and believing women are allies of one another. They enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong and establish prayer and give zakah and obey Allah and His Messenger. [Qur’an: Chapter 9, Verse 71]
Most importantly, at times when you are feeling weak and fear that you may go back to sinning, your friends should be there to help you get back up, steadfast and stay strong.
Allah’s Messenger Nabi sallalahu alayhi wasalaam said, “The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith’s bellows (or furnace); from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell thereof.” [Bukhari]
You could find good company by becoming a regular at your local mosque and socialising with the people you meet there. You can also attend public lectures to find like-minded friends. You are guaranteed to find practicing Muslims who are willing to be part of your support system. Even in your own home, be open with your family – mother, father, siblings or spouse – about the changes you want to make in your life and ask for their help!

Stay Connected

The last and final point stresses on how important it is for you to stay connected with Islam and the Muslim Ummah. It is very uplifting for the soul when you are surrounded by Muslims seeking knowledge together and worshipping together. Make an effort to visit the mosque regularly and attend Islamic lectures and workshops. Keeping yourself busy with useful Islamic events and surrounded with the Islamic community takes your mind off the worldly things, which may trigger your urge to commit the sin once more.
Staying connected also helps your connection to Allah ta’allah. Reading the Qur’an regularly and performing your Salaah on time, including the sunnah prayers, keeps the connection lines between Allah ta’Allah and yourself strong.
Once you feel that Islam encompasses all parts of your life and that you are truly close to Allah ta’allah, it will be hard for shaytan to drag you back to your old sins. However, always remember to continuously keep asking Allah ta’alah for guidance and protection. Keep asking for His forgiveness as He is the Most Forgiving, Most Merciful.
No matter what sins you have committed, there is always a way to repent and start afresh. Always have faith in Allah ta’alah, fear His wrath and love Him for His mercy. Surround yourself with as much support and motivation as you possibly can and keep your intentions clear but most importantly clean and pure. May Allah ta’alah support us all on our journey through the right path, keep us steadfast in our beautiful Deen, keep us as his beautiful ummah close, but most importantly guide us to a pure transparent Nafs AMEEN.. Ya Rabbul Alameen….

Love was never meant to be perfect, it just needed to be true..

She lived a meaningful life.. Until!!!!
Everyday was a blessed and beautiful day, she was carefree, a free spirit most would call her, so happy that people thought it was a facade of some sort..
A facade,
No way was it any front, she was naturally full of life and umphhh…
She did not merely exist, she loved her life, she woke up everyday knowing that her every new day was to be the best day of her life and so she lived free and happy, knowing that nothing else was important nor mattered because she was the captain of that ship and she chose her Destiny..
Until one day…
The day that would be the end of all that happiness and self worth, the day she would so unconsciously stop living for herself but start living for someone else, the day that would teach her ever so harshly that the life she chose to live was going to be nothing more than a fragment of her imagination…
The day she would finally be introduced to that very petrifying four letter word called “LOVE”..
She never knew anything like this before, was she selfish in choosing to love ALLAH first and then be solely true to herself second, wanting to find true and pure love within, before having the need to explore that emotion with someone else…
She was to learn a very grave lesson because not everyone would love as truly, madly or deeply as this pure soul would, she was to pay for hurt caused by total strangers and still have to learn how to live through that, was this fair to her? Did she really deserve all that you will now learn she went through? Was this pure true soul deserving of such selfish, self centred love? She endured it only for the sake of ALLAH… She like anyone who believed, believed that love was a beautiful gift handed to everyone by Allah…
And as usual everything starts amazing, the late night, early morning calls, those texts that would melt you by just looking at them, all those crazy in love emoji’s, the sharing of love songs, with such powerful meaning, but sadly no pure intent, the mushy phrases that played repeatedly in her head, the hop she suddenly found in her step and all those feelings, those feelings that just left her weak and unguarded, tearing down those walls of protection with one fell swoop.. This poor soul clearly had no idea that the honeymoon only ever did last that long..
The first meeting, hmmm magical, that first kiss, knee jerking, and the call afterward emotional… How oblivious was she to the fact that all those sweet words were merely a trap… The second meeting even better than the first, dinner and talk of a future, how over-whelmed she felt knowing that there was actually a Prince charming made just for her… She never fathomed that their third meeting would be infront of an aalim, turning that love into halal love… That’s when all her beautiful dreams where to be turned harsh reality...
No sooner than she realised she was too find out that her Prince charming merely camouflaged himself in tinfoil, he was nothing more than a sweet talker, a smooth operator, a lustful boy who was about to reveal his true identity… A man he really was not, unlike her all he lived were for his own selfish desires…
Days went by and re-adjusting became a tad difficult, waking up to that awesome full of life feeling of life slowly crept away…
Weeks went by and she slowly slipped into severe depression, because this once bold and outspoken woman had to now become somewhat reserved, her opinions never mattered anymore, the only thing that did matter was how she would keep him happy, what she could do not to tick him off so he would not let his anger get the best of him… She had learnt in a very painful way to stop living for herself…
That Friday afternoon, after him deciding she deserved sometime, they sat side by side watching that chick flick she was surprised he chose, his phone beeped, not once, not twice but repeatedly, she tried not to pay attention, when it got much, she asked softly, aren’t you going to get that, his reply, looking all heated up, it’s not important…
And then it rang.. He answers very angrily,
I told you not to call, I’m busy he said and all she heard was a faint female voice crying on the other end… You promised you would, he replies very arrogantly, take your turn woman and hangs up…
Her heart stopped, she refused to want to believe that this guy, this amazing man who swept her off her feet belonged to others aswell… Was it possible???

She wracked her brain wondering… Eventually!!!

She mustered up the courage to ask, who was That?, he looked at her and then away, remaining angrily silent, she asks again, this time in a tone soft with fear, my love are you seeing someone else, at first he was quiet, his face turning a whole new shade of red, then he turned to look at her with such hate in his eyes and with anger he grabbed her and shoved up against the wall, at that moment her every dream came crashing down, her hope of true love fell into a million pieces, pieces she knew would never be able to be picked up ever … at that moment the pain she felt was beyond just physical…
He let go after a few seconds of having her pinned by the throat against the wall, she fell to the floor and that’s when she was to come face to face with her greatest fear of all time.. Fear of facing her angry husband..
All knowing that his wife was expecting their twins, with poisonous anger and one swift motion his foot had placed itself in her bulging abdomen, she lay on the floor breathless, in shock and the worst part was that he kept at it, until he saw her lifeless body not moving…
She lay there pale and gasping for every breath she could take, tears streamed over the side of her face as he leaned over to pick her up, and with a smirk saying, i am the man in this relationship and you will never question who I see and don’t…
Grabbing her by the throat he squeezes so hard that her gasping gets more intense, she weakens out, her body slumping into shock, her face turning blue, he kept at squeezing all because she asked is there someone else… The gasping suddenly stops.. Her already lifeless body losing the last not of its Will, she stopped breathing…
He let go, and her lifeless body fell to the ground, you deserved that he screamed, he screamed at her lifeless body, not realising at point he had been telling at a corpse, minutes passed and with him sitting on the couch holding his head, he finally picks up his head to look at his wife, he called out her name, once, twice and a third name, she never replied, or looked at him with her beautiful smile, he walked over to her looking down at her and right then and there it washed over him, what had he done… He fell to his knees grabbing her lifeless body, why did you have to question me, you knew regardless I made you my wife, they never mattered only you did and he sobbed knowing that he was never going to see her smile again…
OH ALLAH WHAT HAVE I DONE.. He cried..
Has my love for lust really taken my one true love from Me, oh Allah what have I done…
It was too late, his greedy lustful behaviour had ended the life of a beautiful Soul.. And unborn innocent souls that had clearly no chance of experiencing life… That day he took the life of a woman he vowed to love and protect and the life of his unborn children, a huge part of him died that day too, and all because that beautiful soul had asked a question she had every right asking…
Remember my dear brother, if it is not good for her, it should never be good for you, think and think harder before making a true woman pay the price for your inability to be faithful, more importantly, never take a good woman for granted, regret can be a very painful thing to live with…
Always bare in mind that love does not have to be perfect it simply had to be true…

The end of their beautiful journey..


20 June 2002, a day she never knew would change her life in the most drastic and unchangeable way…
It was a very dull and dreary Thursday morning, she woke up as usual around 5 am, showered, read fajr salaah with her dad, got ready for work and was on her way out to start her rat race once again for that new day, her dad walked her up to the bus stop and saw her off, she really could not understand why saying goodbye to him on that specific morning felt so intensely painful, tears welled up in her eyes but she was sitting on a bus full of people so she had to fight it and just contain the sadness she felt..
The routine morning briefing with her boss, the meet and greet with all her office mates, and as she walked back to her office she felt the need to just break down and cry, all these emotions of sadness so new to her, she gets to the office door and shuts it behind her only to have her tears gush out, moments later she muscled up, took out her Yaseen the one that dad had given to her and she read, and that’s how her day had went, crying or reading Yaseen..
During zohr salaah, she found herself asking for Allah to protect her dad, keep him safe, to bless him and that made her even more emotional… As she had very attached to this amazing man…
The rest of that very painful day had dragged on, minute after minute all she thought of was her dad, and so at exactly 4pm she picked up the phone to call her mom like she everyday…
To her amazement dad answers, hey dad, how are she went onto asking him, and so that conversation went on with him telling her about how hard he had worked that day cleaning the garden and pruning all his trees (a secret about her dad, his garden was his pride and joy), then went onto saying to her, what will people think when they all come here and see an untidy yard…
What people dad, she asked..
He paused, and seconds later went onto saying to her, girl (now that was his pet name for his little girl) you have to be strong for yourself, stand up for what is right like I always taught to and don’t let me down, Not now not ever, by this time she had choked up so badly she could not hold back her tears…
Dad, are you okay she asked, and his reply was, please come home quickly daddy is waiting for you…
By this time a million things had been running through her mind, the anxiety kicked in and her breathing became deep and painful…
Dad I must go now but i will be home soon i promise, and right at that second, the second before cutting the call…
Her dad called out to her in a very soft sad tone, girl remember daddy loves You, I may have never said it before but you know dad loves you very much and thank you for always being so caring to me.. By now she felt her heart sink, girl please be strong for you and mummy, be the soldier I know you are he said and before she said anything he hung up, at that point her heart racing uncontrollably, all she could think of was getting home, so she ran a to the lift got downstairs and took off her shoes and ran aimlessly down lorne street, nearly getting knocked but that did not stop her, she just continued running, she had no idea why, all she knew was that she had to get home, getting to West street drenched and just in time to get the last bus home, the entire way home she sobbed silently, as the bus drove past her home and not seeing dad at the stop waiting for her she panicked more…
She gets off the bus and runs home, to walk in and see her beloved father walking down the passage to greet her, smiling but at the same time running his left shoulder, dad are you okay, she asked as he hugged her, yes I’m okay, just feeling a little discomfort and indigestion he replied… Where is the eno’seno’ s he asked, in the cupboard dad as she walked off into her bedroom…
Five minutes into putting her bag down and sitting on her bed, she hears a heavy thud, almost as though something had fallen really hard, she ran out her room and to her horror she sees her dad lying back flat on the floor of their sunroom, dad, she screamed, running to him, by that time her mom had already picked up his head, she grabs her dad’s feet, daddy no, she cried painfully, calling 911 with her dad laying on the floor, the agent answers and she cries to him to send an ambulance, by this time the agent, who being Muslim, tried to calm her asking her how her dad had been breathing, and all she said was my daddy’s feet are cold, his breathing from his tummy upward, 1 deep breath, the second breath slightly less deep and the last breath shallow and all she heard the guy on the phone say, please read his kalima and so she did dropping the receiver and grabbing her beloved fathers feet, a smile on his face and his head falls to the side, her mom’s calls out to him but there’s no response…
Moments later the paramedics arrive, ma’am could you kindly give us some space to work with the patient, so quickly hooking her dad to the heart machines, trying to shock him, adrenalin injection after the other…
She watched anxiously sobbing hard praying that her worst nightmare, had has become reality, and that’s when the paramedic comes to her mom, I am so sorry ma’am, we did what we could but his gone…
Silence befell both her and her mom, everything around them stopped and suddenly what felt like a warm loving home at that very painful moment felt like an ice cold morgue…
They both walked over to him laying lifeless on the ground, she fell to her knees and put her head on his chest, nothing, no movement, nothing, daddy please don’t daddy she cried, and right then and there she realised that was she was alone, no daddy, no best friend, no confidante, her whole life came crashing to a million irreplaceable pieces…
A day that changed her, changed her life, a day a very big part of her died too and a day she had no choice but to soldier up and move forward because that was the day Allah had taken away the one person who got her, who understood her, who trusted and loved her beyond condition or measure…
That was the day she had to learn how to be her own best friend… She had to learn the hard way how to fend for herself, she had to start making her own decisions and choices as daddy was no more… Daddy was no more to hold her hand and to guide her through this cruel deceptive life…
20 June 2002.. The day that had changed her life forever…
The end of their beautiful journey…
Gone but never forgotten…
The advice and motivation I bring you today…
For those of you who have both parents treasure them, it is not always that either your mom or dad will always be justified in decisions, or how they love you and your siblings, some may feel that one kid is favored over the other, let it be, make your own way in this world, learn to fend for yourself whilst their still here so you don’t have to scratch your head later on after their gone.. Forgive them, make dua for them, and always wish the best for them as they are human too…
To those whom have lost a parent like myself or maybe even both parents, be grateful for the love and good teachings the one May have given you or the tough love the other gave You, remember in that pain you felt feeling neglected and like you you loved less, there was a wise lesson too…
Today i stand tall and walk proud thanks to the wise words of my late father, I can decipher right from wrong and I know better than to hurt anyone to get my way, I am a survivor only coz he dumped me in the deep end and even though he was with me in spirit I felt him pull me through my trials and tests, thank you my beloved father for handing me the right tools to be the best version of me…
Regret can be a very painful emotion to live with, so try your very best not to live with regret, ever..
You were my confidante, my bestie and my one true love…
And today I can say I know you were the best Dad any kid could have asked for… I pray that Allah Ta’Allah Grant you Jannah my beloved father…

Pride.. A very deadly vice!!!

The disease of pride and arrogance deletes all traces of goodness and piety. This is the worst vice in causing havoc to Deen and a regrettable disease to have for the believers of this perfect and exalted religion. It launches a direct attack on beliefs and principles. If ignored and overlooked for sometime it becomes fatal and incurable, and gives rise to other spiritual maladies and vices… which are no less than 4 in number, as i will now mention…

1. Being deprived of truth and truthfulness. The heart becomes blind to the verse dealing with knowledge about Allah. It is a very grievous vice in which the mind of a man becomes dull and impervious to the understanding of Deen…
2. The wrath and punishment of Allah fall on the jealous person, Allah certainly does not love the proud at heart…
It is narrated that Hazrat Moosa AS, asked Allah: “Oh my Lord! Who is the most deserving of your wrath and displeasure?” Allah Ta’aala told him:
“ It is he whose heart is filled with pride and his tongue is filthy (i.e. Abusive), his eyes are devoid of shame, his hands are miserly and he is of bad conduct and character.
3. Allah will put the proud to disgrace and ill-repute (dishonour) in the Hereafter.
Hazrat Hatim Asam (rahmatullahi alaihi) has said: “Do not die in a state of pride, greed and arrogance.”
Allah does not cause a proud human being to meet his/her death unless he/she is disgraced and dishonoured by his own family, relatives and servants.
Similarly the greedy does not meet their death unless they become destitute for a morsel of food and a drop of water.
In the same way the arrogant person does not meet his own death unless being polluted with his own excrement and urine.
4. The proud renders himself liable to Hell in the Hereafter. It occurs in a Hadith Qudsi:
“Pride is My cloak and grandeur is my trousers. If anyone disputes with Me in any one of these (two) I shall admit him into the Hell-fire.”
In the other words, pride and grandeur are two exclusive attributes of Allah, which none is allowed to apply and ascribe towards himself.
It is imperative to refrain from such a dangerous and deadly calamity which leads to loss of knowledge of Allah, inability to understand the commands of Allah, His displeasure, disgrace in this world and the Hereafter and painful torment therein. No wise person can be neglectful in the matter of such a harmful and destructive calamity.
We should, therefore, try to save ourselves from this and seek refuge from Allah.
This is a brief account of the some if not the most poisionous calamities, mentioned in the beginning. Each of these detrimental adversities are very harmful and dangerous in the sight of those wise and knowledgeable people who are aware of the importance of the reforming of ones heart.
Those are the four disease and vices that stem from having pride. How many of us are there that can honestly say, without deceiving ourselves that we are free of this hated ailment?
Not many, is the answer. It is imperative that we take heed, that we bear in mind the punishment promised by Allah Ta’ala to those with pride in their hearts.
Pride as a sin is incorrectly considered to be insignificant and minute in comparison to other major sins, by a vast majority of people. It may be that compared to the major sins like murder and associating partners with Allah, it is slightly inferior. But that is only because of the magnitude of those particular sins that pride is considered a lesser sin.
In a Hadith of the Holy Prophet (SWA) it is narrated that,
“Whosoever has in his heart, even a atom of pride he will not enter paradise.”
In observing the above Hadith, it is of utmost importance that we get rid of this spiritual malady, if we hold any illusion or hope of entering paradise.
Remember that we do claim to be the followers and believers of Islam and we claim to be Muslims, so how then can we still pride ourselves with poisonous pride, For the very meaning of Islam is to submit totally and unconditionally to the worship of the Supreme Being, Allah Ta’ala and as Muslims it is incumbent upon us to get rid of every drop of pride, superiority and haughtiness within us, as we are small and inferior and basically nothing in comparison to the Supreme Divine Fashioner, if such comparison can be made. Let us try and act upon the very essence of our religion and our adjective as Muslims and submit and surrender ourselves to the worship and pleasure of Allah Ta’ala… And Allah Ta’ala only, Ameen…

Stop taking things for granted..

We are all so much more fortunate than we give ourselves credit for. We constantly so preoccupied with thoughts of things we don’t have and experiences we are missing out on.
We need to learn to be appreciative and grateful for everything we have and everything that is written for us to receive. If we all stopped for a moment and looked around us, we would find endless things we have that others are not as fortunate to have. People complain constantly about having an outdated model of a car or phone when we should just be grateful we have these things in the first place.
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, and confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates vision for tomorrow.”
You really do not know how good you have it until it’s gone. In relationships, people tend to get too comfortable and as a result becoming bored and complacent. This can result in infidelity and the destruction of the very foundation of that relationship. Only until after the relationship has been ruined does this person realize the terrible, irreversible mistake they have made and cannot undo. At this point it becomes too late, this person failed to realize how fortunate they were and as a result destroyed what they loved.
People are unfortunately in life-altering accidents everyday. If you take something for granted, you don’t worry or think about it because you assume you will always have it. Some of these people will never have the ability to walk again, something we take for granted on a daily basis. Tragedies like this should make us re-examine and re-evaluate our lives.
“Never take someone you love for granted. Hold every person close to your heart because you might wake up one day and realize that you lost a diamond while you were too busy collecting stones.”
Shouldn’t we just be happy we have food on the table and a roof over our heads? So many people in the world would do anything for these things, but we still complain everyday that we do not have enough.
We take advantage of the people in our lives, like our friends and family. We make the fatal mistake of assuming that these people will just be there for us without providing extra effort. A person who is not grateful toward their parents is one who has taken their love for granted.
“Learn to appreciate what you have before time makes you appreciate what you had.”
This is a natural occurrence that happens to everyone in his or her life. It is a default mode we all get into when we become complacent in different aspects of our lives. We need to regain the consciousness of the things in life we have become so accustomed to. Imagine how hard life would be if we didn’t have access to the Internet or to food or to clean drinking water. When you make yourself aware of how blessed you really are, that is when you learn to appreciate the “little” things in life.
Life is too short to waste our time thinking about what we do not have. We obviously can survive without them, we have made it this far. Things do not make us happy, it is how we feel within ourselves that really matters. What you get out of your every moment depends entirely upon your attitude toward life. The things that truly provide happiness are usually right in front of us. What we need to do it continuously remind ourselves where we would be without them.
“Never fail to appreciate someone who cares for you. Just because they are always in your life to help in some way, never fail to give thanks or recognition. To value someone or something too lightly is a risk no one should take.”
In order to achieve wanting only the things and people that you have you need to look into the positive things you gain from having these people or things around you. What we so easily take for granted, others are praying for.

Do we truly understand what it means to be enough..

You are enough.
I believe that, that you are enough, just as you are, just as you were meant and made to be…
However i want to be clear about what it may or may not mean…
Because “you are enough” does not mean that you have been measured, considered even judged, and through those mediums, you have finally earned the label of “enough.”
It does not mean that you have worked long enough, tried hard enough, presented well enough. It simply is who you are. The you that you are, is enough.
You do not have to be more, do more, or even buy more to be who you are meant to be…
Now that is what i mean by saying, “you are enough”…
You are enough does not mean that you are a final product, complete and finished, all done growing and changing and learning things forevermore…
Nor does it mean that you are all-powerful and perfect, either…
You are enough does not mean that you are everything...
The pursuit of enough flies in the face of the pursuit of everything. Having a good grasp on “enough” means you do not have to get everything, and you certainly do not have to be everything…
You are enough does not mean that you have to be self-sufficient. It does not mean that you do not need anyone or anything else…
It means you understand how much you do need, how small you are in this great, grand, magnificent universe, and that you do not have to be even one inch bigger than that…
You are enough absolutely does not mean that you never need help…
When you know you are enough, it becomes easier to ask for help. It is easier to admit your weaknesses…
You know that your imperfections and your difficulties do not reflect on your worth, because you are already enough, just as you are…
You are enough does not mean that you are flawless, or that you never make mistakes.
You know that you make mistakes. You know that I make mistakes. I make mistakes every single day. I am aware of my flaws even before my feet hit the floor every morning…
That does not mean that my flaws are the true’st, most important thing about me, it just means that i acknowledge them…
I acknowledge their presence and i know they exist…
Hi, flaws!
(YOU ARE MINE)
If “being enough” means “being perfect,” then you are enough is just another reason to hide your true self. You hear that kind of “you are enough,” and you think: well! I know i am not perfect, so either i am not enough, or i have the urge to hide who i really am…
No…
You are enough means that you were made to be YOU, as YOU are, on purpose… Allah taal’ah never created imperfection, we create imperfect images by negativity, we eat, breath and live with…
It is no mistake that you are this person, in this place, at this time by mistake…Your presence at this particular time has valid purpose…
You are enough as you are, mess and all, beautiful and broken, showing up for your life every day…
That is all you have to be and all you have to do…
You are already enough…
You are enough means you can grow and change and continue to become, because you are not trying to prove yourself and that to anyone but yourself…
You are enough means that you do not have to strive to become more worthy, more valid, more acceptable, or more loved…
You already are all of those things…
You just need to believe that…
There are things you might want to be more of. More open. More honest. More true. More authentic. More free. More connected. More intentional. More purposeful. Those are all expressions of your enough-ness. They are not about changing yourself, they are however about being your trueself…
You were enough before, you are enough now, and you will continue to be enough as you become more of who you were made to be…
Now my dearest, that is what i mean when i say that you are enough…
And you are…