Freedom of Choice..

We are free to choose our actions, but we have no control over the consequences of our actions…

People forget the great power they possess within, the power to shape their lives.. Our lives are shaped by the choices we make. You are the one who chooses how to live your life or create your life’s path. Our future will not be determined by chance, but rather by the choices we make today. Life is a series of choices. I like to call it the GOOD, the BAD and the UGLY. The choices we make now affect the options available for the next round of choices. Learning how and what to choose, may be the most important information You can educate yourself with. There is no such thing as the perfection or even the perfect human being. Everyone has flaws whether we choose to accept ìt or NOT, whether we like it or NOT, but it is not something to become tense or even stress about. It is our imperfections that make us that make us imperfectly perfect human beings. These imperfections school us about ourselves and the mistakes we make in life. Lessons learnt from those mistakes tend to teach us how to be better and not make us bitter. Fortunate are those who make the concerted effort to learn from those mistakes, and by not letting those very mistakes rule them, now they become a step closer to being better than they were the mistake before, being a tad more knowledgeable as to whether the next act should be a good or bad one.
There are moment’s moments in our lives when we find ourselves at crossroads. The choices we make in those moments can define the present and determine the future. And, of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back.
Which I totally disagree with no matter how painful or difficult the adversity, move forward, fight against every obstacle and you will always find success.
There may be times we make choices that cause our path to become tough, confusing and uncertain. Our path seems like a series of hills and valleys, there is never any balance. When this happens, we should stop and examine the choices we made that have lead us down this path.
We should evaluate those choices and identify alternativesor new choices that will bring us back to our true path, the one we originally created. If you have chosen to be someone who wants to keep on judging, then go ahead, don’t expect any better from anyone else…
If you choose to live a deceitful, disgraceful, unethical life, then please don’t expect nature to do you any favors, if you have turned away from Allah for that quick fix solution, I suggest you kick the habit and repent, as it is never to late for Allah’s mercy and forgiveness…

Once again we shape our lives by the choices we make…

If you don’t make a decision and by this i mean all the right choices and decisions, then time will make it for you and time will always side against you…

Desires dictate our priorities, priorities shape our choices, and choices determine our actions…

The Choices We Make Determine the People We Become.

Knowledge is a tree
Words are it’s leaves
But Action is it fruit

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then you have become a leader.”

Importance of relationships..

We all process relationships, may it be work or personal, through our very own perceptions and in saying that, when we relate to someone only through our own perception, it becomes one-dimensional and a tad unfair, leaving us with a warped view of reality.

There is a saying that goes something like this, “perception is reality”.That may be true, but it may not be, “actuality” or rather (living in reality). There is a big difference between ones perception and the raw truth. External influence and internal dialogue shape perception. No truth can ever be influenced, therefore the truth will remain just that, the bitter truth.

When we start relating incidents only through our reality, we stop seeing the whole picture, and that becomes the biggest relationship killer of all time. Relationships need a 360-degree view to bloom. People outside the relationship who have nothing to lose or gain by bringing truth to the conversation can often help. This is the power of coaching.

Assumption:

We are all guilty of making assumptions of the people with whom we are in relationships with, like i said earlier, it could be work or personal. If i put away r5 for every time i heard “they always” or “they never”, I would be a millionaire. Many times, we assume things about others without thinking of how our cheap behind close doors chit-chat or even taking time out to ask them what reality is or what is even in their hearts. And this i find hilarious, how quick are we to jump on our high horses, with no fact, make assumptions and pass judgement based purely on what we may have heard. That is a class act relationship killer. Our assumptions are often based on our own experiences and perceptions. Right or wrong, this actually says more about you and your character than about the one, you judged or made an assumption about. Making an assumption, simply means passing judgement, good or bad. Off late i have been observing, “When people get defensive for a lie caught out, or offended about a truth, that is when the act of assuming and judging steps right in.” Many of our offences actually come from assumption and not from “really what happend” or simply “reality of a matter”. Someone may say something to you and because you assume you know what he or she meant, you get offended and sever the relationship. Instead, we should seek understanding, ask questions, or get advice from someone outside the relationship to see the full picture and gain full knowledge, from a perspective unknown to us rather than someone waiting to fuel heated coal.

Expectations:

We tend to expect alot from people we are in relationships with. The problem is we usually do not communicate those expectations. Based on our perception and assumptions, we will often put an unachievable expectation on someone, to what we want, when we want because we can do just that, expect. Every relationship must have negotiation and communication within it to be healthy and have an understanding as well as the freedom to be able to set boundaries and still remain in that relationship, now that is the place to teach each other what to expect and what not to.

When those expectations are not based on reality and agreement, they to become relationship killers and i say this because our expectations often come from a place of hurt or broken trust or simply the need to feel superior, it becomes impossible for the other person to achieve them. If we do not know what we want, how can we expect any other person to have knowledge of that? And that is were i recommend communication and agreement for clarity. This gives you both an opportunity to share your hearts and helps also achieving the expectation.

Every relationship, regardless of the intimacy level, whether at work or home suffers from these three killers! We are often not even aware we are doing this, it takes conscience effort to overcome the tendency.

Three transparent ways to bury relationship killers:

  1. Invite someone you trust and discuss your tendencies in these three areas with that person. Ask him or her to hold you accountable by pointing out when they see you doing it, privately of course. Meet regularly to go over or vent about your actions.
  2. Correct your mistakes by talking to the people you have offended in these ways. Ask for forgiveness and invite them to share their hearts so you can understand them better and also lean were you may have gone wrong. This is not easy, but very powerful.
  3. Soul-search, introspect and look deep within your heart to understand why you do this. Perhaps seek counsel to dig up some roots to allow healing to happen in your heart. When you deal with the deeper issues in your heart, these three killers lose their power in your life.

I would like to end leaving you with this thought.

We do not have to look to far to see the pain that often comes from broken relationships, we have all experienced it.

Rather then hiding or running away, work at it. Rather than putting others down to look good, work on were you went wrong and how you can fix it. If you know you are working hard and tirelessly, do not seek gratification from your peers, do not demand acknowledgement, rather let your hard work, success and silence speak for you, It is far less painful to work on these issues than it is to walk away. We all carry the baggage from the last relationship to the next one, so let’s us make sure it is good luggage. Be a humble dot that connects in a peaceful manner to create a beautiful picture with all dots before and after you, no picture is ever complete if one dot goes missing.

Practise Patience and Gratitude

Until we introspect again .. Remember relationships do Matter…

The truest meaning of Courage..

Courage is not a brilliant dash nor a daring deed in a moments flash, it certainly is no instantaneous thing.. Born of despair with a sudden spring, it is not a creature of flickered hope, nor the final tug of a slipping rope, it is however something deep in the soul of a woman, always striving to serve some greater plan.. Courage is not the last resort in the work of life or a game of sport..

It is not a thing that a woman can call at some future time when she’s apt to fall, if she has not got it now she will have it not, when the strain is great and the place is hot, for who would strive for a distant goal need always courage from deep within her soul…

Courage is not a dazzling light, that’s flashes and passes away from sight, it is a slow, unwavering ingrained trait with the patience to work smart and the strenght to wait..

It is a part of a woman when her skies are blue, it is apart of her when she has much to do, the brave woman is never freed of it, she has it even when there is no need of it..

Courage was never designed for show, it is not something that can come and go, it is written in victory and defeat and every trial a woman will meet..

It is apart of her hours, her days, her years, behind her every smile, and behind her tears, courage is more than a daring deed it is the breath of life and a strong woman’s creed..

So i end by saying, above all that’s been said..

Be your own heroine in the play of life..

Never the victim of circumstance..

Have courage beautiful🌹

No need to rush…

Having spent a little time by myself and in meditation, it really has opened me up to so much, everything in life we do is rushed, or has to rushed.. We are always in such a hurry for absolutely everything, but as human we are going to err from time to time that is inevitable, however the one thing all this teaches us is PATIENCE/SABR…

Spending time with someone..
Rush through that visit, or you miss a movie/series you watched over like a gazillion times..

Making Ibadah..
Race through Salaah, or else you lose customers, friends get tired of waiting, time for social media, TV, etc gets minimized..

Charity..
Take photos, lots of photos, make videos and lots of them, an instant rush hits you and you need to upload them in a hurry so”people” can “ooh” and “aah” about the amazing work you doing..

I could truly go on, the list is that long, however these are things we are all guilty off, things most valued to ALLAH we have taken for granted..

Spend time with those closest to heart and treasure that time for once the moment is lost and long gone, you are never getting it back..

Accept that apology you never received and make dua for that person/s that may have broken you, maybe their fight is not really with you but themselves..
Forgive, most importantly i stress on this “FORGIVE AND LET GO”and DON’T seek revenge..
Let ALLAH do what needs to be done, that after all is HIS job..

Why rush our ibadah when everything we rushing from and toward has been graciously granted to us by ALLAH Ta’allah, our time on this earth was only lent to us.. The air we breath was lent to us, the TV sets, money, luxuries of life we rushed toward was created by creation of a magnificent CREATOR..

Prioritize my dear one..

Today i choose to rush away from the illusions of a temporary life and toward what is real, TIME WITH MY LORD..
Spend more time with the ones i love, for who knows my tomorrow is certainly not guaranteed.. I FORGIVE..

Pray, isolate yourself and pray, cry, throw a tantrum, fight with ALLAH, because that is what HE loves is when HIS creation throws themselves at his mercy HE becomes so overjoyed HE starts blessing them with what HE knows best for them..

Can we truly today say that ALLAH is happy with us, or the states our hearts are in???
ARE WE HAPPY WITH THE STATES OF OUR HEARTS???

Make that time to ask, repent and beg ALLAH today, with no hurry and no need to rush and that sincere dua may just be answered sooner, rather than later..

#reflections
#introspect
#stoprushing
#commitedtopleasingmyLORD

Six C’s of LIFE..

Complain..

Do not complain, there is always someone, somewhere who is worse off than you are, wishes they have what you do..

Live with an Attitude of Gratitude!!!

Condemn..

Take a long hard look at your actions, before putting down or tearing apart another for their actions!!!

Criticize..

Be your own personal critic, criticize yourself first, if you can handle that and correct your own fault, then only should you think about criticizing others or their faults..

CHOICES.. CHANCES.. CHANGE!!!

YOU HAVE GOT TO MAKE A POSITIVE AND CONFIDENT CHOICE TO TAKE THE BOLD CHANCE OR LIFE, YOUR LIFE AS YOU KNOW IT, WILL NEVER CHANGE!!!

A letter of hope..

This is something from me to you..

You who may feel hopeless, stuck between a rock and a very painful place..

You, who has given up believing that hope is just not possible..

If that is YOU.. Believe me you are not alone!!!

To you my broken Friend, I understand that things have not been easy of late.. Every passing moment of every single day feels exactly the same.. YOU so badly want to let that painful scream out the darkest part of you, because you just do not get any of it anymore, nor does anyone around you, get you either.. You are so terribly misunderstood..

Everyday feels more and more like a downward spiral, you pray for hope, but still everything keeps going miserably wrong..

Somewhere in all that darkness the only thing giving you any sort of comfort is that ghastly word “suicide”, ending it all constantly crosses your mind, that is the one option that seems to make sense or feel right, you would have to feel anything ever again..

You close your eyes, take that deep painful breath and you pray, you pray a little harder, asking your LORD, to clear your mind, heart and soul of that evil thought, because you know it may be a quick fix but it just is not the right thing to do…

My Friend, Believe me it does get easier..

I was once you, I searched for acceptance and the feeling of finding so desperately to have that void filled, searching in people i imagined to be real and true.. Once i made the conscious decision to turn to my CREATOR, I learned of a love so true, so pure and so absolutely unconditional.. I found what i had so desperately needed to fill that void..

I learnt the hard way that people would only care and accept me when it suited, if i lived according to their say so, and fed their hunger for convenience, all the while losing more and more of myself, falling further and deeper into their notion of reality, and a truly miserable darkness..

I chose not too..

As much as that had dropped me in their eyes, my FASHIONER had a bigger better plan for me, HE elevated my status and HE lifted me in HIS sight..

Right then and there i realized that all i ever did need was my LORD, and my friend once you realize that, nothing and no-one will have the power to ever tear down the wall of protection ALMIGHTY has protected you with..

So chin up dearest friend, life will not get any better if you sit there feeling sorry for yourself, or expecting a pity party thrown in your honor, change will come with ease when you fully hand your troubles over to your CREATOR, and walk away with hope and faith, not looking back to go take back and try fixing it yourself, trust that ALMIGHTY will do the most perfect job in making it all right..

Because our need to want things fixed now and now is so powerful, ALLAH starts holding your blessings back, HE asked you to hand him your troubles and pray, pray hard, cry, fight, have that long overdue chat with Him..

ALLAH Ta’Allah wants us to appreciate what HE gives us and when..

HE wants to teach the art of being and practicing patience, by holding back what we desire and what HE knows is not good for us, and in HIS time shower us with what HE knows is best for us.. HE wants to give us what we will not expect and bless us with what HE so DIVINELY wrote out for us..

Remember dear Friend, there will always be something or someone, that will cause grave pain to us, not really having knowledge of the situation, be patient and forgive them anyway..

For our LORD is all we really need through this journey of life.. Trusting in ALLAH, there will always be hope, having hope means you have finally had faith and entrusted ALLAH with all your obstacles, for HIM to make brand new what may seem so badly broken..

Be strong Friend..

Have faith Friend..

ALLAH will heal You..

And believe that HE will have mercy..

Our beautiful snowflakes..

Kids are like snowflakes, none the same, all unique and so beautiful..
Sadly society puts upon them that deathly grip of insecurity, forcing our angels to perform pretentiously..
They teach them..
They teach us that if you are hyperactive, you are a defiant, rebellious, good for nothing diliquent..
They teach kids with autism that their disability is a disease, callously telling them that they will never get to where they want or need to be in life..
Fear is created and instilled..
They preach to them that grades are everything, and that even if you show your best work, you will fail..
You will fail, and fail, and fail, until suddenly..
You are a 20 year old sitting in a class of 12 year olds..
The anxiety caused by these assumptions create pain..
Kids will start searching for guidance, searching for anyone, someone, who might be able to understand their struggles, but rarely do they find it..
They create shame..
If you have depression, they say, “it is all in your head or the best one” “get over it.”
When you cry, they will presume that you cry at everything. They will strip your freedom from you without remorse..

You are but a child to them..

Adults have power..

Do not let them get to you..

Do not let them drag you down..

For you a snowflake..

Unique…Yourself…And A Beautiful Snowflake 💋

It all happened the day i changed me…

The human mind can be oh so deceptive, when something goes wrong, we turn a blind eye to the reason it could be happening and start playing the blame game..

“Oh someone must have done it, oh he/she did it, it’s his/her fault she is destroying him/her”..

Take a step back, stop, and most importantly think..

It is simply not humanly possible for everything that goes wrong in our lives to be someone else’s fault, it goes wrong because our choices are not pleasing to ALLAH..

Is it really someone doing something unnatural to us, like our minds feed and poison us or is it the QADR OF ALLAH????

And so many of us are guilty for having these thoughts, making accusations and not actually taking responsibility for those very actions..

I cannot go around blaming the world because i made a conscious choice of putting people and their emotions before ALLAH..

I simply cannot go around pointing fingers callously..

Making a change needed to start with and within me..

Allah will give you so much and so much of what you want, to watch how you walk with it, are you walking with it respectfully, are you walking with it shamelessly???

Food for thought hey!!!

The foundation of attaining anything is having ALLAH as the solid entity in this life HE gave us, having a LIT, TIGHT relationship with the DIVINE..

A test is set out to us, to shape and mould us..
Heartache is felt because that very heart needs to love ALLAH first..
We face loss only to be blessed with bountiful gain..
It must all at some point fall apart, to be re-arranged in a manner pleasing to ALLAH..

And as you will have noticed by now, that i mention ALLAH before everything and anything said and done..

Having made ALLAH my foundation..
I have attained peace of mind..
I have been blessed with rizq..
I have seen the unseen and have been saved from it..
I have found my true purpose..
I now know what is unpleasing to my LORD and stay away from it avoiding the chance of it poisoning me again or making my FASHIONER angry enough to test me again..

We control what we go through and sometimes losing ourselves and sight of it all is just the wake up call we need 🙏

I am a better version of me today because i chose ALLAH to be the foundation for this life of mine..
I have been so truly blessed with a new, deep, refreshing kind of love for my FASHIONER..
For accepting my fault and making it right, for accepting who i was created to be and not be someone unfamiliar to me..
I have learnt that i cannot go through this life neglecting the ONE who gave me this life..

Yesterday i made the conscious decision to change me…

TODAY ALLAH CHANGED EVERYTHING AROUND ME…

SHUKRAN MY RABB, FOR ALL THAT YOU DO AND FOR ALL THAT I AM 💖
SHUKRAN YA RABB FOR SHOWING ME MY TRUE PURPOSE 💝

AND IT ALL HAPPEND THE DAY I CHANGED ME…

Living her best..

Right here, right now.. She is living her best life!!!

She is focused on her relationship with GOD and HE has given her the strenght to focus on herself.. She is falling so deeply in love with who she is.. She is ecstatic about where she is headed and more so excited about what is next… She has become goal driven, so many dreams and filled with ambition and she is constantly finding new passions… She has learnt to be spontaneous… She has learnt to start taking risks… And she has finally stepped out her comfort zone…You see right now she is on a path stepping toward her own happiness… She is chasing what feeds her soul… To be honest with you, she could care less about people, their opinions or what they are doing… She has learnt to stress less about what people think… Because right here and right now, she and her life are filled with a priceless peace…A new light… So much growth… So much faith… And hope she just cannot explain… And right now she is just living her best life, and there is absolutely nothing and no-one that can say or do anything to get in the way of that… “Deep soul”

Mirror Mirror

Have you ever looked into the review mirror…

And wondered!!!

Cars carry a message, “Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear”. We need a message on our personal mirrors that reads, “Your image may not be as it appears, look within yourself for true reflection”.
Who am l?
When i look in the mirror, who is that looking back? Am i who i appear to be? Do i try to mask the interior of my personhood by decorating the exterior with designer labels. Have i become so accustomed to give an impression of other than my true self that i have begun to believe and accept the false image i portray? Each one of us should seriously reflect on this.
The need for maturity and integrity
Integrity is about being yourself at your best, being honest, being honorable and being true to the noblest of universal values. Maturity entails taking responsibility for your own life, taking rational decisions that reflect the best that you can offer. The touchstone of maturity, however, is personal integrity, applying basic values to the decision making process and thus living in a way that allows your personality to be consistently good. In reality, integrity is about moral maturity, what it is to think and act in a way that reflects the full stature of a rational human being.
Life shaped by choices
Our lives are continually being shaped by the choices we make and the convictions and values that underlie them. In this sense, our lives are like works of art, in progress. We can take the material of life and either react to it in a passive way, always remaining life’s victim, (hiding behind a mask), or take it and use it creatively, becoming the architect of one’s life and a participant in shaping one’s destiny and in designing one’s true personality.
Reach your full potential

The holy Prophet is reported to have said that Allah has prescribed goodness and excellence in all that you do. In relation to evolving human potential and developing personality, this statement motivates a person to utilize one’s life skills in the most progressive and pro-active manner, demanding the demonstration of dignity with pride, courage with conviction, patience with perseverance, power with mercy, authority with justice, duty with commitment, principle with wisdom, freedom with discipline and honor with compassion.

Let your imprint be a heart-print
We may try to impress people by leaving behind a particular impression of our self or imprinting an image of some kind. We leave behind various kinds of imprints throughout our lives, imprints that makes distinct our uniqueness. Each one of us have swirly lines on the tips of our fingers that provide a map of our individuality called fingerprints. The footprints we leave behind temporarily indicate the direction from which we have come or in which we are going. Voiceprints are somewhat unique to individuals and can even be identified by little babies if the voice belongs to one close to the child.
All these prints are some form of physical manifestations of who you are. These can be obscured, wiped away or smudged, but there is another kind of print that is never wiped away, it is the imprint you leave when you positively affect the life of another person, heart-prints. Unlike your fingerprints, footprints and voiceprints, with heart-prints there are no lines, no sole marks and no sound wave peaks. What you witness is the impact and effect you can have on the lives of those you touch. You might see a smile in return for a greeting or a tear when sharing an emotion or feel the warmth of a hug in return for your consolation. Heart-prints leave indelible imprints, ones that sustain and enrich life for years to come.
True You
The only way to leave true heart-prints is to be uniquely you and to share with others the essence of who you are at your best, no masks, no charades, just the bona-fide you, uniquely you, you-nique.

Can a moment of appreciation and inspiration result in mindset shift???

Is it possible to change or alter an individual’s mindset by a moment of appreciation and inspiration???
I THINK SO!!!
It is a theory that we all, as individual’s in our own right, have an inherent desire to show affection to a fellow individual. If work relationships can be used as one way to test this theory, then there is an absolute preciseness to this theory. Once a senior shows appreciation to an employee, and creates a equality environment between him and the employee, and gives the employee a comfortable setting in which he can relax and think with a clear mind, it seems to alter the individuals behavior in the coming moments that follow after this interaction.
In domestic relationships between an adult and a child, similar behavioral changes can be observed, the same between two partners.
If these observations is enough to go buy, is it not possible to take this to an external setting, creating a moment of appreciation and affection between an individual you do not know, but seems obvious that he or she needs such a moment. Taking in consideration the results that these moments generate, it should surely have a positive impact on a random individual.
Maybe, just maybe, a massive amount of our current affairs are directly related to our current society’s culture not showing enough appreciation towards another. We can observe this selfish culture anywhere we look, individuals breaking each other down like there is no tomorrow. seriously, how do we expect to develop an improved tomorrow, if we can not identify and accept these simple failures of today.
Are we failing our own future…

The way we behave toward others, is a reflection of who we really are…

You may have heard it before, but it is such a strong statement:
“We can only see things within others that we see within ourselves.”

I think this is one of the most challenging spiritual lessons we are here to learn. When i first saw this statement it seemed very odd to me. Like most people, my first response was, “Surely, i do not act like a lot of people who annoy me and push my buttons.

..
Everyone you meet is your mirror…

Why is that?

We come to understand ourselves best through our relationships with other people. We can only be triggered by something we have experienced ourselves. The traits we tend to dislike in others are usually the traits we do not like about ourselves. We then tend to judge and criticize these characteristics. This calls to mind the analogy of pointing a blaming finger at someone. One finger is pointing at another person, and three are pointing back to ourselves…
When certain characteristics in someone’s personality trigger a negative reaction from you, there is something within you that is coming up because it is ready to be healed. Usually, it represents issues from your past that have gone unresolved. An example of this would be constantly attracting people who betray you in close relationships because you have not dealt with a parental abandonment issue from your past. What you are seeing is a manifestation of your belief that you cannot trust anyone with your feelings…

Here is another example:

You are someone who has a constant need to prove to others that you are “right.” Chances are you will attract people who strongly disagree with you because they also have the need to convince others to see life from their perspective. Also, if you dislike controlling people, most likely you dislike some bossy tendencies within yourself.

Every person we meet in life is showing up at the perfect time in our lives to reflect something we need to heal within ourselves. The people with whom you interact are showing you who you are and ultimately providing you with an opportunity to love yourself. Since our mission is to discover what we do not love and learn to love it, the people who get on our nerves the most are among our greatest teachers...
When you find yourself triggered by a person or situation…

Ask yourself the following questions:

“What is this person teaching me that I need to learn to become more whole?”
  • “Do I behave like this now?”
  • “Did I behave like this in the past?”
Believe it or not, forgiving YOURSELF is the most effective way to disengage from negative interactions with people. We can only love and accept others to the degree that we love and accept ourselves. When you make it a habit to learn from your relationships, eventually you will discover that you can observe negative traits within others without judgment and without getting hooked into someone else’s drama. If you discover that you are in a relationship with someone who habitually abuses you in some way, it is sometimes healthy to limit your exposure to that person or to avoid their company completely. This serves you well only after you have embraced the lessons that you have seen reflected to you through the relationship, followed by choosing to forgive yourself and the other person.
The good news is that the desirable behaviors we see in others is also a reflection of ourselves. When we predominantly choose thoughts of love, we live in a reality of love. In other words, as we focus on our light within, we bring out the light within others.
We came to this earth to return to the remembrance that we are ONE. Everyone we meet has come into our path to help us to remember this.
Do you find it challenging to believe that what you see in others is a reflection of you?
I need You, I trust You cannot do without You My rabb I will never put anything above You..
My Rabb let my reflection always be one you are pleased with…

Ameen Ya Rabbul Ameen

Finding your way a very though provoking piece…

..Woman-up to the situation..
..Wise up from the situation…
You need to know this. It will not be easy. It is a path that may not be forgiving. And the end result, while completely satisfying… May be close to your expectation. But it needs to be done.
Girls have remained in the shadows of their parents households for far too long.
Children in general, are confined to the comfort of their parents haven and develop no desire to conquer the world. I refer to the aspirations they don’t have in that magnitude because I believe if everyone does a little, a lot gets done.
Stagnation is to humans what rattex is to rats.
Own the silence. Devour the loneliness and there will be nothing stopping you from conquering the world of opportunities at prosperity out there.
There were times I sat back, looked up at the bare ceiling and blankly tried to recall my past. Every decision I’d made, good and bad.. Every memory I had. Every turn I took in my life.. and what it had in store for me. The nostalgia was nauseating.
It made me feel like packing up and going back home almost immediately.
You see I was brought up in a home where I understood that I never needed to “struggle”. Where the thought of working just to make ends meet was as foreign to me as the concept of honesty is in politics.
But after minutes of contemplation and nostalgia I would return to my reality. What would I achieve? Would I be another statistic? A typical case of “Girl goes out, doesn’t make it, ‘runs’ back home”, or, “‘Running’ back to daddy to save the day”.
I hated it. I hated being looked at as though I were a daddy’s girl who received everything on a Golden platter because that made it seem like I was absolutely incapable of doing anything on my own.
Are you like that? Can you not do anything for yourself? What then, would you say, is your worth?
Would you consider yourself a Role model for anyone?
If not.. Why not?
The concept behind the story about giving a man a fish vs. teaching him to catch it was based on the ideology that the greatest gift you can give to anyone, is Knowledge. Knowledge.. from the cradle, to the grave.
Someone worked.. hard.. perhaps, smart.. But worked, nonetheless, to give you what you have today. To get you to where you are. And someone will work the very same, to give you the comfort and lifestyle you desire. The power is with you, to determine if the person I am referring to for the future, is you.. Or someone else.
The greatest gift any child can give their parents is the surety that they are capable of standing upright in their values, steadfast on their morals, and footed in their direction. That being as you are, you will be able to “make it out there”, in their absence..

Nafs..

NAFS {intentions of the heart}
How often are you faced with desires from within and temptations all around?
Those desires that push you to seek fun in every possible way, permissible or otherwise. It drives you to compete with your peers just to pass time and maintain the status quo. In the same way you are driven to an inner battle against yourself. You are drawn in different directions.
To do or not to do..
To say or not to say..
To listen or not to listen..
To touch or not to touch..
To look or lower your gaze..
To give in to or bust the stress..
Your nafs whispers to you, telling you how much you need to blend with the culture, lifestyle or friendship. It tells you that you have many years ahead and should not stress about worship. And encourages you to live beyond all limits.
Such whispers pull you away from the truth and distract you from submission to the Will of the One true Lord & Creator.
Those distractions can make you feel troubled, anxious and far from contentment.
But, you posses every capability of engaging in good, controlling your desires, building your skills and freeing self from negative influences..
“So direct your face (i.e., self ) toward the religion, inclining to truth. Adhere to the fitrah of Allah upon which HE has created (all) people.

No CHANGE should there be in the creation of Allah.

That is the correct religion, but most of the people do not know.” [Q (30):30]

Connecting with your Nafs

The Nafs is an inherent part of you, an innate portion of your pure fitrah [natural inclination].
It has the potential to drive you towards the good and not-so-good direction in life. Yet your inner self or nafs, and its lowly desires constantly directs you towards evil. You have a duty to overcome its weakness and win over its plots. You can achieve this through cultivating a sound heart, one that submits and surrenders to Allah, the Almighty.
With a sound healthy heart, your nafs can guide to a better spiritual perception. It can also serve as an emotional bank for steering good feelings and building a positive mindset..
In another of its important role, it provides a suitable station for your intention. The heart is the permanent residence for all intentions. .

So how do you win against your Nafs?

Your soul in its true nature will direct you towards honesty, helping others, kindness to parents, helping humanity and worshipping Allah (swt) alone; while any form of corruption from your desires can lead to cheating, arrogance, immorality, engaging in mindless chatter, watching lewd scenes and abandoning worship..
When the commanding soul [An-nafs al-ammaraah bi-suu’] overshadows your reproachful and tranquil soul [An-nafs al-mutma’innah], you fall low and become distant from Allah.

While the tranquil soul has the potential to connect you strongly with Allah (swt) through worship and obedience and fulfilling your purpose of Creation.

Some things that may corrupt the pure nature of your soul include..
– Lack of authentic knowledge; Quran & its teachings.
– Environment; Peer pressure; cultural pressure; parental pressure etc.
– Weakness of faith.
– Desires; from materialism to nationalism.

10 ways you can overcome your Nafs (commanding soul)

1. Constant purification.Increase in your worship acts and strive for obedience of Allah (swt) at all times. Follow His guidance through the teachings of the Quran and Hadith. You should prioritise with the compulsory acts such as five daily prayers, even as you try to pick up the supererogatory ones.
2. Conscious awareness.Your nafs is conscious and as such you have control over decisions you make that will impact your daily life and the hereafter. Therefore be conscious of Allah (swt) at all times and make a choice to break free from the negative desires and inclinations.
3. Avoid sins and prohibitions.And always follow an evil thought, speech or act with a good one. You can achieve this through learning and seeking beneficial knowledge. In that way, you can sieve the truth from falsehood; and permissible acts from prohibitions.
4. Remember the test of temporal life. This temporary life is a test and a preparation for the ultimate abode, the everlasting world and hereafter. Which then is more worthy of striving for?
5. Follow the Sunnah. In our beloved Prophet (saw), we have the perfect example. So follow him and you will not go wrong.
6. Think of positive & negative effect of every action.For example, with the 5 daily prayers the benefits from physical to psychological bring serenity and a tranquil effect even beyond the prayers. While delaying/missing prayers due to laziness and negligence may bring about guilt, feeling of burden, regret, need to make excuses etc in addition to amassing sins.
7. Use your time wisely.Assess your time & accompanying deeds. And try to keep positively busy with rewarding acts. Do something for the Ummah without expecting a profit. Make it an investment for your hereafter.
8. Keep good company.Mind your environment and those you choose to stay around. Choose those who can help guard your creed & deen.
9. Purify your acts through your intentions. Renew them as often as you can, centred on Allah’s pleasure and to earn paradise. Is paradise and its wonders not enough motivation to give up the instant gratifications for?
10. Make Du’a. Make supplications for a sound & pure heart, one that is filled with Allah’s love but yearns for even more of Allah’s (swt) love.
{The heart can only become sound, achieve success, take pleasure, be satisfied, experience enjoyment, become pleased, attain serenity and calmness through the ibadaah (worship) of its Lord, having love of Him and turning to Him (in repentance). Even if it were to attain every type of pleasure from creation, it will not acquire serenity & tranquillity. This is because the heart possess an intrinsic need for its Lord, since He is its deity, love and pursuit and with Allah the heart achieves joy, pleasure, delight, amenity, serenity and tranquillity.}

Blame Game..

CHANGE THE PLAYER,NOT THE GAME THEY SAY….
MY SENTIMENTS ON THAT???
IF THE PLAYER IS NOT WELL VERSED TO PLAY THE GAME, WHY ATTEMPT IT…
Take the risk, Yay… Nay….
MAYBE… MAYBE NOT!!!
WHAT DO YOU THINK????
I often wonder about change, it is quiet simple to ask someone to change, but change is more like an “I want to action” rather than “someone is telling me to change so i must order to self sort of act”
We will always expect the player to change, why not try changing strategy, by that i mean making a personal change that way the outcome of the game will not just be satisfying but gratifying too…
CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE…
Change begins with me…
In these circumstances, be an outside force who cannot and does not force change on anyone especially against their will. Be the common factor – the only person that can actually enforce any sort of change.
“The only change that is really going to dramatically affect your game is you”.
Any true sincere change comes from within and starts with me first…
THE REAL ACT OF DISCOVERY CONSISTS NOT IN FINDING NEW LANDS BUT IN SEEING WITH NEW EYES…

If you make no change, nothing will or can change.
How do we look at ‘the old lands with new eyes’?
Here are three ways:

1. Admit it:

Problems persist because we deny them.

And what makes a problem big is simply that it is yours.
If you found yourself in the hospital with an injury, would you walk around, pointing out the injuries of others in the emergency room? Or would you be making a beeline to the doctor’s office to find healing for your own pain?
We tend to have it all wrong when it comes to real life. Everyone has problems. No one is perfect. But we want to fix that person and their issues first before fixing and putting right our own.
Break the cycle..
Don’t underestimate the power of admitting any problem. Admit your problem, and then begin the journey to finding a solution.
2. Make the grass greener on your side..
WATERING YOUR OWN PATCH OF DRY LAND WILL HOLD MORE BENEFIT THAN PEAKING INTO SOMEONE ELSE’S PATCH….
You need to take responsibility. If a problem exists, say in a relationship, you are most likely part of the problem. Doesn’t really matter whose fault it was at the beginning. Seek to create solutions.
You make the grass greener on your side by taking the initiative. Make the first move…
You must also understand that change is a process, not an event…
“Little by little fills the pot.” Small changes – in our thoughts, behavior, words – indicate progress.
The entire situation might seem unresponsive at first, but consistent small steps will eventually bear fruit. Remember that the grass does not become green in one day. It has to be planted first. Then nurtured.

3.Distinguish between intentions and expectations:

Intentions come from the heart. You take responsibility for your own intentions.
Expectations on the other hand are placed on others. You can hope for something but it’s never guaranteed that you will have it.
Unfulfilled expectations often lead to stress, fear or disappointment while true intentions, the only thing you can really control – will increase your enthusiasm and joy of living.
Learn to sow good seeds. For example, you can decide, “I want to be perfect partner” instead of “My partner has to perfect him or herself for me.” Just as you are a work in progress, so too is the other party….
THE HEART OF ANY PLAYER SHOULD CHANGE BEFORE ATTEMPTING ANY GAME….

Everything comes from up Above.. Good or Bad!!!!

So often we lead to questions :
I am doing the best i can.. ARE YOU REALLY?

I do everything everyone asks, i never say no to anyone, i am always willing to help and be of assistance, people know my situation but still take advantage…

WHY ALLAH, WHY ME???

WHY IS ALLAH TESTING ME???
EVERYTHING GOOD AND BAD THAT HAPPENS TO US IS DETERMINED BY ALLAH…
Honestly these are fair questions, but it is also important for us to realise that ALLAH determines everything for us and with great reasoning too, we may never understand why at that specific moment, only ALLAH knows why and for what ever reason….
WHEN WE FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE REACHED THAT PAINFULLY DEAD END..
KEEP THIS THOUGHT AT MIND AND IN HEART :
ALLAH LOVES ME AND ALLAH WILL NEVER GIVE ME MORE THAN I CAN BARE!!!
Only ALLAH has the divine power to decide what we have and do not have in this life, ALLAH may choose to place you in a very difficult situation for a very long period of time, but does that mean that because of the situation we now need to lose hope. And faith, and turn to vile sources just to “BETTER” the problem? You need to always remember that ALLAH knows your agony, and HE knows how sincere the heart of HIS creation is, it is imperative that you keep it together and never lose faith, be patient, be grateful, and make DUA….
It is very easy to turn to evil vices to get your way, but what human forgets is that only what comes from ALLAH is permanent. So no matter how deep you sink in acts of Jadoo, Voodoo, Witchcraft and whatever else is giving you temporary power, remember dear human that will fade away too, for only Satan has the ability to take you that high before He pushes you off your pedestal…
THE REWARD MIGHT NOT ALWAYS BE IN THIS LIFE…
SOME REWARDS ARE GRANTED ON THE DAY OF QIYAMAH…
Depending on your situation and the kind of person you are, ALLAH sometimes does not reward his creation in this life, as ALLAH is all knowing, he might probably save that persons reward until the Day of QIYAMAH, because it will definitely be much greater..

ALLAH DOES NOT HAVE MUCH REGARD FOR THIS BORROWED LIFE AS I CALL IT…
IT IS ONLY A STAGE OF AMUSEMENT TO THE EVIL, AND A STAGE OF AGONY AND GRIEF TO THE SINCERE HEARTED…
THE REAL REWARD WE WILL RECEIVE IN THE HEREAFTER…
THAT IS WHERE OUR DEEDS /ACTIONS AND NIYAAH, ARE TAKEN INTO CONSIDERATION AND EITHER ADDED UP IN OUR FAVOUR, OR JUSTLY MINUSED AGAINST US…
A true believer never expects much out of this life, what keeps them sincere and with faith intact and unbreakable imaan is knowing that one day they will meet their “DESIGNER”… so they make the effort of facing this life with patience, perseverance and most importantly Prayer…
LAST BUT NOT LEAST :
My advice to those brothers/sisters who are struggling through painful situations, in this temporary life…
1. Be your honest best, with fairness and justness in everything you undertake. As long as you try your honest best, you will have no regrets, nor find the need to apologise for anything. Watch out for developing arrogance and excessive self confidence by having the mindset that you are always right and perfect and that is just how it is..
(“Nor walk on the earth with insolence: for thou can not rend the earth asunder, nor reach the mountains in height.(The Noble Quran, 17:37)“)
2. Do not have expectations, for no gain in this life is a gain, and certainly no loss in this life is a loss. Keep saying to yourself, “I will only do what is right and pleasing to ALLAH, I will do my honest best and leave all decisions, outcomes and consequences to ALLAH….
3. Keep a positive attitude and a smile on your face, no matter how difficult your trials are, do not throw pity parties by creating lies and gossiping for sympathy, rather give everyone around you a reason to smile with you and hold you in high regard and that will have them saying, no matter what he/she is going through, they have not stooped to levels of sympathy seeking, but rather being positive by maintaining confidence in yourself and most importantly in ALLAH, and that is someone we choose to surround ourselves with…
4. As our beloved Nabi said to his best friend and companion Abu Bakr Al Siddique, who had been crying and shaking, don’t be upset. ALLAH IS WITH US!!!!
5. NOW TAKE A DEEP BREATH, CLOSE YOUR EYES AND REPEAT AFTER ME…
MY CURRENT SITUATION IS NOT MY PERMANENT DESTINATION….
We need to toughen up and deal with life’s ISSUES with the strongest of imaan and the purest of trust, NOT IN ANY EVIL VICE OR ANYTHING THAT DOES NOT PLEASE ALLAH…

TRUST ONLY IN ALLAH!!!!!

Now instead of ALLAH WHY ME???

Rather.. ALLAH TRY ME!!!!!

Bitterness.. The venom that destroys your heart, mind and soul..

The actions of a bitter person often leads to him/her wanting to control everything and everyone around them, it is the most toxic way anyone can live their lives..

Your need for wanting to be in charge can lead to you turning to all the wrong sources of “looking for help” to be in control….
You may get the effect you want now, but remember nothing in this borrowed life is permanent so no matter how much money you spend trying to get things going your way… It will not last..

Bitterness Exposed

None of us ever wants to be bitter. But like a thief in the midst of the night it sneaks up on us..
What is bitterness you ask?
Bitterness is simply built up pain and anger that has been left to ferment from within. The more you hold onto past experiences the more you become intoxicated on those unforgiven moments and the experience hijacks happiness you can find.. Leading that to create a whole new type of character trait…
Bitterness occurs when you feel someone has taken something from you that you are powerless to get whatever it is back, and when you do muster up the courage to get yourself away from whatever was holding you down, that new controlling character trait starts growing inside, spreading like a disease, consuming and turning everything good into everything evil, dark and vile…
Holding on to what suppressed you in an attempt to remind yourself and others of the injustice you have experienced in the hope that someone will save you and restore what you have lost. Unfortunately, bitterness only makes your sense of the injustice grow. It does nothing to heal the wound caused by the injustice. In fact, it causes the wound to become infected with anger and fester. It causes you to want snatch away happiness from those around you to feel a sense of “I am now in control, this is now my circus and you are my monkey”… To you this may seem right and the only way, but logically the only person you are hurting is you, and the only person controlled is you and that to by the anger you have allowed to fester inside you… Still want to blame the hthe person who caused the hurt?, I think not!!!
Bitterness.. “Anger’s nasty sibling” …
Bitterness is anger’s little sister. Where anger can be just and moral, it propels you to seek solutions for the wrongs you have experienced in all the wrong places, anger is a deadly sin because it becomes ugly rage that feeds on itself and adds to wreckage caused by the original wound. Bitterness does this too, but instead of burning down the house with everything we value still inside, bitterness is quieter, slowly poisoning your life until you lose it one joy at a time
I will now give you a few ways you can overcome the Deadliness that Devours and Destroys our souls….
1. Forgiveness…
Forgiving the wrong doer does not mean that you have to now pretend everything is “OKAY.” Neither does it now mean forgetting the pain, forgiveness is simply the act of surrendering our desire for revenge and wanting to be in control, releasing that evil desire to hurt those around you for someone hurting and causing you pain.
Forgiveness is the gift you need to gift yourself with and this will enable you to stop picking at the scab and start making a plan for healing…
2. Making a plan..
Forgiveness allows you to free the chained energy you need to start the healing process. If the person who hurt you is willing to work with you, try mapping out exactly what changes or effort you both would need to see from each other, to let you know that it is safe to reconcile or not, however remaining civil toward each other and the situation. If you choose to be on your own, focus your energy on making a plan for how will you strive to regain as much of what was lost or taken from you as possible. The more you strive to find alternative ways to recoup your losses, the less bitter you will feel even if the hurt persists. It can be tempting to give into feeling that “there’s nothing I can do”, but resist the temptation. In fact, if you feel this way and cannot think of solutions, talk to a professional to check your math before deciding that you just need to grieve your loss. If, after consultation, you find that there really is nothing you can do to reclaim what was lost or taken from you, focus your energy on developing new goals that will help you reconstruct a compelling future. The Qur’an has many beautiful ways you can heal without wanting to destroy everything around you by that ghastly disease called CONTROL…

3. Stop Dwelling and Re-telling..

When hurt, we have a tendency to play and replay the painful events over and over in our minds or tell anyone who will listen about our pain, over and over again. We need to talk to people that can help us heal the hurt, facilitate reconciliation or help us rebuild our lives, but other than that, we should do what we can to stop dwelling on the pain and stop speaking of it so freely to others. When we are tempted to “dwell or re-tell” the best course of action is to refocus on what we can do “HERE AND NOW” to take a step toward refining or actualizing the plan we developed in Step 2 (making a plan). The more you are focused on solutions, the less you will experience the sense of powerlessness that comes from ruminating on the hurt and the less you will binge on the idea of revenge…
4. Seeking Guidance…
It is nearly impossible to heal wounds without Almighty’s grace and guidance. Bitterness causes us to shun Allah’s grace in favor of obsessing over the wound. If you are holding on to bitterness I encourage you to take it to your musallah. Please do not be insulted by the suggestion. I know that you are the victim and you have a right to your pain, but as much as you have the right to hurt, turning to Allah should be the only form of assistance we seek, holding on to anything except almighty’s love, mercy and healing power separates us from Allah and sends you straight down the the dark evil path of doing whatever it takes to forget the pain.
Dua can open your heart to receive the healing Allah wants you to recieve. It will help surrender the pain and powerlessness and begin to discover new options. Stop hoarding your hurt. Make your desire for healing official by taking your tendency to dwell in the powerlessness straight to Allah.
5. Seeking Help…
If the bitterness will not let go after you have tried all of the above, it is time to seek professional help. Working with a professional in both fields can help you see possibilities that your pain has blinded you to and give you new tools to heal the wounds that are holding you back…
You do not have to be bitter or consumed by feelings of powerlessness and sadness. Take control of you and your heart, control how you feel, control your actions..
Do not fall short on asking Allah for help, do not plant that bitter root, do not cause trouble and defile anyone…
Do put your trust only in Allah, trust that only Allah can set you free, break that chain of bitterness that has been burnt into your soul, only with the help of Allah will there be less pain, no desire to control anyone but your own nafs, and you will discover that there is so much more to life than pain…

Virtues of Patience and Gratitude..

PATIENCE :
The mother of all virtues it certainly is..
Patience/Sabr, allows us to reflect so that one can be appreciative of the substance, circumstances, wonders, encounters, pleasures, pains, accomplishments, irony, riddle, answers, anticipation of life, or be remorseful for actions of oneself that lead to the forgiveness of oneself and others.
It allows room for growth to forgive and make amends to ones and others. It is the primary component for persistance, steadfastness, diligence, self-analysis, friendship, sincerity, understanding, Love, & wisdom.
With patience the ant can eat the elephant. With patience and steadfastness the tortoise won the race against the hare.
Patience will allow one to understand, prevent hasty uninformed decisions, and give room to the balance between heart and head when making decisions about complex matters.
Patience is the mother of resolve, whispering into the ear to give the benefit of the doubt, to be forebeaing, to imagine the shoe on the other foot, to eshew envy, to be grateful, to be optimistic,to look at the entire gameboard of Life.
Patience is always tested no matter how much you think you have there is always need for more. When used more patience is required to acquire more skill at using patience. Through patience we can know tge best version of ourselves, because patience removes the veils that conceal the treasures within us.
Patience helps to answer the largest one word question. Why? Patience has hospitality to “Why,” and to its cousin, “Why not”.
Patience is the best companion for unrequited Love, and the pending death or illness of oneself or of kith and kin (one’s relations) . Patience holds the hand, strokes the brow and wipes the tear, when sorrow visits.
Patience sharpens the sense of humour to help one laugh at oneself. Patience shows the path to piety, through which learning & discovery comes.
Caterpillar sheds its skin to free the butterfly within.
Courage and discretion are children of Patience. Creativity & imagination become manifest because of the patience of meticulous, diligent, & deliberate effort.

GRATITUDE :
Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others….
Picking a favorite virtue is like picking a favorite child. It’s the kind of thing you are supposed to pretend not to do but that everyone does anyway. We can toss chastity and temperance out of the ring straight off, obviously. They are important, in their own right, but exactly no one is going to make them contenders for the title. Same for thrift and simplicity. Nice to have, but not first-tier virtues. Fellowship is fine, but a luxury.

And justice?, that is the virtue we would much rather have done unto others than practiced on ourselves. No thanks.

Knowledge acquired through curiosity grounds your other virtues, while leaving to you the choice of what those virtues will be. “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” It is the alpha, the point from which all virtues must begin. Gratitude that allows us to appreciate what is good, to discern what should be defended and cultivated.

“Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others.” It is the alpha, the point from which all virtues must begin. Gratitude that allows us to appreciate what is good, to discern what should be defended and cultivated.

You need not believe in God to pursue the virtues (though it certainly helps). Yet if you do believe, then your first instinct in all things must be gratitude: for creation, for love, for mercy. And even if you do not believe, you must start again from gratitude: That a world grown from randomness could have turned out so fortuitously, with such liberality.

“We value these things not because they are triumphant and invincible but because they are precious and vulnerable, because they were not fated to happen, and they are not certain to survive. They need us and our gratitude for them should move us to defend them and to build on them.”

Gratitude magnifies the sweet parts of life and diminishes the painful ones. It is the wellspring of humility and ambition, the magnetic pole for prudence, the platform for courage, the inducement to charity and mercy. And in addition to everything else, gratitude is the engine for progress: We build not because we are dissatisfied with the world as it is, but because we are grateful to all those who have built it to this point, and wish to repay them by making our own contributions to their work.
None of this is to say that the world is perfect it is not. But if it’s to be improved, that improvement will come, one person at a time, through the exercise of virtue—through the conscious decision of all of us to try to be better people, to live better lives, and to make a better world. All of which begins, from first light, with saying “Thank you” for what we have, right here and right now..

We were all created with a individually unique purpose to through journey called LIFE..

Almighty created us all with unique purpose. What is your’s?
A purpose you ask???
Most of those who reflect or Introspect about life in any sort of detail will consider and ponder this question. Some would hold that the purpose of life was to acquire wealth.
Yet suppose they were to acquire millions, what then would they claim is their purpose after doing so?
If the purpose of life is to become wealthy, there would be no purpose after becoming wealthy.
The fact is that when people approach their purpose here in this life from the aspect of only gaining wealth, once that wealth is obtained their true purpose is lost and then they live in restless tension suffering from a feeling of worthlessness with all that wealth.
How could wealth then be considered the purpose of anyone’s life?
Could the acquisition of wealth guarantee happiness?
Of course not.
A child of 5 years of age, would obviously prefer a new toy to a deposit slip for a million rands.
A teenager does not consider millions of rands in the bank a substitute for movies, videos, pizza and hanging out with his/her friends.
A person in their 80s or 90s would never consider holding on to their wealth in place of spending it to hold on to or regain their health.
This proves that money is not the main purpose of one’s life.
Wealth can do little or nothing to bring happiness to one who is a disbeliever in Allah, because regardless of what he or she would gain in this life they would always live in fear of what will happen to them in the end. They would wonder what would become of them and how they would end up.
Wealth and its accumulation as a purpose would be doomed to a temporary success at best and in the end it would only spell out self destruction.
So, what is the use of wealth to a person without belief? He would always fear his end and would always be skeptical of everything. He may gain a great material wealth but he would only lose himself in the end.
To a Muslim the whole purpose of life is “ibadah” or worship to the One True Almighty on Terms and under His Conditions.
The term “worship” to a Muslim includes any and all acts of obedience to Almighty Allah.
So his purpose of life is a standing purpose; Worshipping Allah by accepting Allah’s Will over his own.
This act of ibadah [worshipping, thanking and extolling the Greatness Almighty Allah on His Terms and Conditions] is for the Muslim, throughout his whole life regardless of the stage. Whether he is a child, adolescent, adult or aged person, he is seeking after the Will of the Almighty in all these stages.
His life here on earth although short, is full of purpose and is totally meaningful within the complete framework of total submission [Islam].
Similarly, in the Next Life as well, his faith, intentions, attitudes and good deeds will all be weighed into his account as favorable putting him in high esteem with his Creator and Sustainer.
Because Islam teaches that this life is only a test or trial for the individual to show him his true nature it is only natural that he would accept death as not so much an ending to everything but more as a beginning of the final and lasting life in the Hereafter.
Before entering into either of the final lodging places i.e.; Heaven or Hell, there will be a Day of Judgement and showing of one’s true self to make them aware of their own nature and thereby understand what they have sent on ahead during the life here on the earth.
Every person will be rewarded [or punished] according to their attitude, appreciation and efforts during this stay on earth. None will be asked about the actions and beliefs of others, nor will anyone be asked regarding that which he was unaware of or incapable of doing.
As the life here is considered as an examination for the individual, the death stage is considered as a resting period after the test. It could be easy for those who were faithful and dedicated or it could be grueling and horrible for the wicked.
Reward and punishment will be in direct proportion to each person and it is only Allah, alone who will be the Final Judge over us all.
So in the teachings of the True Surrender, Submission, Obedience, In Sincerity and Peace to the Almighty One God [Islam], the line of life and its purpose is logical, clear and simple:
The first life is a test
The life in the grave is a resting or waiting place before the Day of Judgment
The Day of Judgment brings about the clear understanding of what will now happen to the individual based on his own desires and actions
The Permanent or Afterlife will either be spend in luxurious splendor or miserable punishment .
Following this clear understanding of life, the Muslim’s purpose is clear.
First of all, he has no doubt in his mind that:
he is only created by Allah
he is going to spend a period of time in this material world [called “Ad Dunyah” in Arabic]
he knows he will die
he knows he will spend time in the grave, either pleasant or difficult depending on his own choice of attitude and actions
he knows he will be resurrected for the Day of Judgment
he knows he will be judged according to the most fair of standards by Allah the Almighty, the All
Knowing he realizes his attitude and actions are going to come under very close scrutiny
he knows that this short life compared to the Eternal Life was in fact, only for a test
This life is very meaningful and purposeful to the Believing Muslim, as he realizes that it will determine is outcome and permanent position in the Next Life.
The Muslim’s permanent purpose is to Surrender, Submit, Obey, in Purity and Peace to Allah the Almighty, carrying out His Orders and staying in some form of worship to Him as much as possible everyday.
This includes the orders of Allah in His Book, the Holy Quran and His final Messenger and Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him as follows:
Believing and declaring that “There is no god throughout all the Creation of Allah that is worthy of worship, all worship is due only to Allah, alone and He has no partners or helpers nor does He share His Lordship with any of His creations. And Muhammad, the son of Abdullah ibn Abdul Mutallib (1450 years ago) is the last and final messenger and servant of Almighty Allah, and is the culmination in a long line of prophets sent to mankind throughout man’s history, including Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, David, Solomon, Jesus Christ, may Almighty Allah’s Peace and Blessings be upon them all.”
Establishing the regular five times ritualistic prayer [salah] in the stated times (in the mosques for the men when possible)
Paying the charity tax [Zakat = about 2.5% of one’s holdings – not his income, annually]
Fasting the month of Ramadhan [lunar calendar]
Pilgrimage to the House of Allah in Mecca at least once in the life of the person, provided he has the ability and the way is safe..
For a disbeliever the purpose of this life is to collect and amass great wealth, money, power and position. Over indulging in eating, drinking, drugs, sex and gambling are a high priority to them. But all of this will not avail them anything good in the grave, on the Day of Judgment or in the Next Life. Eventually he will be faced with the question:
Now what?
What’s Next?
Where am I going?
What will happen to me?
He will come to know. For sure he will come to know. But then what will the knowledge avail him?
Look how Islam solves the mystery of the puzzle of life. It provides the answers to the questions and concerns of the human beings on all levels and in every aspect. It is really quite simple.
The purpose of life as understood by the Believing Muslim can be simply stated in only two (2) words:
Obey God.
Our only purpose and salvation lie in these two words.
We must come to know our Creator, Sustainer and Ultimate Judge. We must learn to believe in Him, thank Him, praise Him, honor Him and worship Him, alone without any partners from His Creation. We must learn about His Messengers and Prophets, peace be upon them, and the message with which they were all sent. We must learn the Word of God as was directly revealed, preserved and memorized and passed down by memory throughout all the generations of Muslims to the present day.
Those who are in search of truth, having open minds and hearts will recognize this as a message in truth and sincerity. Open your heart and your mind now and ask the Almighty God of the Universe [Allah] to guide you now to His True Way. And then be ready to accept your true purpose in life.

Living with no regret..

“Living a life with no mistakes and without any regret is extraordinarily hard to accomplish. A lifetime of making choices brings with it the knowledge that at least a few actions were ill-considered… And through lifes path we do accumulate regret..
Living life without regret is difficult, chances are you already have a regret or two, who knows maybe more…
Regret is “an insight gained a day too late.”
1. Make time
“I just do not have the time, time is not in my side, there is not near enough in a day anymore..”, do these common excuses sound familiar? These weak excuses can keep you a distance from your biggest dreams to your smallest goals.
Even if you think you don’t have enough time, you need to learn to make the time…
2. Do the things that push your potential to be everything you can be…
When people talk about regret, they often mention the things they wish they had done. But it is more specific than that. It is not just action, it is fulfilling those actions that matter most. It is about getting up and making it happen, not waiting for it to happen. Procrastination is the worst habit one can ever form..
Do you have any idea what the common theme of regret is???
Well…. It is the failure to reach our full potential…
It has been described as self-actualization, the realization or fulfillment of an individuals talent and the ability of becoming the best version of yourself…
Think about some ways people express regret…
Would my life have been any different today if my choices yesterday were better?
Should i have maybe studied harder, or saved more?
I say do not be so hard on yourself, no-one really knows what the future holds, and if it is meant to be it will be anyway, good choice or bad…
People often regret unrealized potential, the unexplored skills or wasted opportunities for personal development. It is important to find something meaningful and fulfilling that can challenge you and make you grow as a person. However if it does not serve you then break the habit…
3. Live by these words: “It’s better to try and fail, than to have never tried at all”
Imagine putting all your effort into achieving a massive goal, but you fail to make it happen.
Now imagine a second person who has the same exact aspirations but never even tries. They do not make the effort of taking that crucial first step because they cannot find, or do not have the courage.
Despite failing, you are still leaps and bounds ahead of the second person. You tried. That is something you can feel proud about for the rest of your life. The other person can only wonder “what if…”
4. Listen to your “shoulds”
It is usually the, “i should have done”, that are the things we often regret the most.
“I should have made more of my life”
“I should have told my dad I loved him before it was to late.”
“I should have never been so kind to all the wrong people.”
“I should have respected myself more and left sooner rather than allowing anyone to manipulate and control me.”
Think about this for a minute. Years from now, what will you say you should be doing right now? Reflect on the answers until you understand all the “shoulds” you have floating around in your head.
5. Use your negatives as a mentor..
I do not see unhappiness as a completely negative emotion. Sure, it may not be a pleasant feeling, but it serves a useful purpose. Are you someone who sees things as:
A LESSON OR A BLESSING!!!
OR RATHER A BLESSING IN EVERY LESSON???
Sadness is a signal that something in your life needs to change. Think of it as a signpost telling you that you are heading in the wrong direction. Listen to it. Learn from it. If you completely ignore or avoid it, you are missing out on an opportunity to make positive changes and get on the path that is right for you.
6. Act on your impulses more often…
As i had mentioned earlier, the actions we did not act upon, are the ones we most regret…
What keeps us away from taking action to begin with?
Psychologically, we put more emphasis on immediate consequences more than long-term ones. For example, someone will stay in a job they hate far too long simply to avoid the short term pain of quitting. Naturally, when they are still in that job years later, they regret not having quit sooner.
One way to get around this obstacle is to act on your impulses. Get into the habit of making quick decisions and immediately doing them…
Start thinking on your feet….
The longer you wait to take action, the more you tend to focus on the short-term consequences rather than the long-term benefits. In a way, you talk yourself out of doing it.
With each passing minute, your will to act weakens. Then you just put off a decision you wish you had made sooner.
7. Find the silver lining to bad decisions…
If you have ever made a mistake, two maybe ten, then let me now say, congratulations, you are human. With all the decisions and choices we face, we are bound to do or say something we wish we had not…
Rather than looking at those bad decisions as something you wish to so badly forget, you can use them to move into a better space as well as future. See each negative hurtful situation as an opportunity to learn and grow wiser. If you can use the bad decisions from your past to make you a better person today, you will feel better about them and they will have served a useful purpose.
For many, those insights come decades too late.
Instead of waiting to see what regrets await me, I choose to rather take action here and now…